August
2003
Our Arthur - 'ave yer sin me poetry? |
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| Arthur
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The
trials and tribulations of Edna and Arthur - a Black Country couple
with a dog and two cats.
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D.I.Y. at Edna and Arthur's
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‘Our Arthur,’ said Edna, ‘Oy’m off ter see Mom –
‘Er cor abide yo’ so yo’d better not come.’
‘Our Edna,’ said Arthur, ‘that ay very fair
Since I spent all last Saturday painting ‘er stairs!’
‘Well today yo’ can paint our back bedroom instead. Oy’ve
bought yer the paint – it’s a nice cherry-red.’ So Arthur
he waited till Edna had gone, Fed Gnasher and told him he
wouldn’t be long.
The he sprinted the two miles to The Shrubbery,
Thought, ’Oy’ll just ‘ave the one and be back afore tea.’
But inside he found his mates Jim, Lee and Stan, Who’d come
down from Wordsley in Lee’s mini-van.
‘We’m out on a pub crawl,’ young Stan then explained, ‘Cos
Jim’s getting’ married on Tuesday ter Jane.’ So Arthur dug
deep and he pulled out five pounds, ‘Yo’d best ‘ave a drink
then – and oy’ll buy the round!’
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| Arthur
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Now
Lee’s a teetotaller when he has to drive
And his Mom had told him to be back before five.
So they each bought a carry-out and set off for Lee’s, To
watch the Cup Final on Cable TV.
At seven to The Old Dial they started to walk, Their tears
of emotion meant they couldn’t talk. ‘See you for the replay,’
said Jim, ‘Thursday night. And oy’ll cancel me ‘oneymoon on
the Isle of Wight.’
But by ten yards or less Arthur’s legs let him down, And he
found himself crawling towards Stourbridge town. Midnight
found him home – all he wanted was bed… He did not see the
rolling-pin crack on his head.
Now Arthur went down just like a ton of lead
And he fell on a tin of the bright cherry-red.
And Edna was yelling as his face hit the floor,
And she called him a sod and she kicked at the door.
Then she froze. ‘Ooh bab! Am yer ‘urt? Am yer dead? For she’d
seen all the red stuff pour out from his head. Arthur tried
to stand up but was groaning with pain. When the hall spun
around him he fell down again.
‘The Angels are coming,’ he sobbed to his wife,
‘But oy ay gorra grumble, fer oy’ve ‘ad a good life.’ And
Edna said, ‘Come on, bab – oy’ll ‘elp yer up,’ ‘And oy’ll
mek yer a brandy with Bovril ter sup!’
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Edna
and Arthur peoem's featured:
 The Cat-Flap
DIY at Edna and Arthur's
Edna Goes on a Diet
Arthur
Does the Housework
If you
think your poetry is as good as Carol's, then why not send it in to
the ³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ Black Country website? Just e-mail the team at: blackcountry@bbc.co.uk
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Find
out more on what activities are available for a fun-filled family day out
in the Black Country area.
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³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ
Black Country Website
The Mailbox
Birmingham
West Midlands
B1 1RF
Tel: 0121 567 6000
blackcountry@bbc.co.uk |
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