成人快手

From Sarah Joseph, Editor of a Muslim lifestyle magazine:

This weekend I put up a post on social media marking the tenth anniversary of my Nana鈥檚 passing, aged 100.聽 I wrote: 鈥淭en years - yet the pain of loss feels as fresh as ever. The depth of grief testament to the love held.鈥� I added one of my favourite photos of us together.聽 Her passing is a moment of pain that I feel I can talk about, but it also marks another grief that I haven鈥檛 been able to acknowledge so easily.

A couple of weeks before she died I went for a scan. I was pregnant, but the scan showed that our son had died in the womb. Exactly the same thing had happened with another child six years before.

Both times, hardly anyone knew I was pregnant. I was an editor and CEO of a magazine, working crazy hours. It strangely felt like weakness to say I was going to have a baby.

After the scan, I had to go back to work that very afternoon. I could not tell a soul that my son -- who I had so deeply longed for--was not meant for this world.

Two massive, life-threatening haemorrhages followed the birth. My husband and I were the only attendees at our son鈥檚 burial. 聽Most of this was kept hidden from the outside world, because it didn鈥檛 feel like something which could be talked about鈥� And then my Nana died鈥� and finally there was a grief which could be acknowledged, although for me - of course, I didn鈥檛 stop working鈥� Because grief for me can look like total focus and 18 hour work days.

I see grief mask itself as different things for a lot of people鈥� 聽Looking like anything to distract us, to numb us, to take us away from feeling 鈥� because feeling is so hard. But feeling is necessary, and ten years down the road, I guess I am exhausted by suppressing my feelings, and I think being able to talk about grief more easily in public would help a lot of people.

Some days I think about the two little people that I never got to meet, and I feel waves of sadness. It took me ten years - but I reckon it鈥檚 okay to say that in public now. 聽It is essential to deal with grief, but I believe we have to recognise and acknowledge it first.

Grief is not weakness, and I believe we shouldn鈥檛 treat it as such.