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16 October 2014
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Brian Gillespie
Brian Gillespie

Mr. Gillespie was born and still resides in Derry. He is a 36 year old graduate of the University of Ulster, Coleraine, having studied English. He has held various jobs and currently works as a clerical officer in a local hospital. Brian has been writing for a number of years.

A Secret by Brian Gillespie

Cupboard

In the cupboard it was safe and dark. Not like the dark outside which is scary because bad people come out then who try to take ye away from your family. Or the dark in the room when ye can't sleep and ye open your eyes and the wallpaper starts to make weird shapes like monster faces, and ye hide under the blankets and ye can hear your heart beating, and ye pray to god to make the shapes go away, then when ye look out again the faces are gone. In the cupboard ye can see shapes too but they're nice shapes like animals and cartoon people and the more ye stare at them the more they keep changing. And it smells nice in the cupboard like trees and clean clothes. And ye can talk to yourself without a grown-up telling ye to shut up. I hide in the cupboard when mammy and daddy are fighting. They are shouting at each other downstairs and I don't like it so I come here instead.

Best Friend

Sean Burke is my best friend but he's not supposed to be. His daddy says he can't play with me anymore because of what I did to his sister, Mary. I was playing with her one day because Sean was up the town shopping with his mammy. I climbed down a manhole and dared her to come down too but she was too afraid. I had a torch on my key-ring so I wasn't scared and I climbed down the ladder into the dark. It was smelly down there and my voice echoed when I spoke. I searched around with my torch but all I could find was a dead rat. I stashed the rat in my coat pocket and climbed back out of the manhole. I said to Mary then I found something down the manhole and did she want to see it. She asked what is it and I said its something really good so she said ok and then I threw the dead rat in her face. She ran home crying and now Sean is not allowed to play with me.

Girlfriend

I kissed Mary Burke today. We were playing hide and seek in the farmer's field when I found her behind a tree. I told her because I found her she had to give me a prize and she said ok. Then I kissed her on the mouth and rubbed against her like I saw my sister and her boyfriend do in the sitting room. Mary said why are ye doing that and I said that means we are boyfriend and girlfriend now but she just giggled and ran away.

Daddy

Me and daddy are sitting in the pub. He keeps buying me crisps and lemonade to keep me quiet but I don't care cos I love crisps and lemonade. I like it when daddy takes me to the pub. I like the sweet, smoky smell and the men who look like cartoon men with their red faces and their funny walks. Ye can make as much noise as ye want in the pub too cos everyone's shouting, especially when the horses are taking people's money. Uncle Bill is talking to daddy about how the horses keep taking his money. Daddy is pretending to listen but he keeps fidgeting with his glass, moving it around the table then taking a wee sip then moving it around the table again. Uncle Bill asks him if everything is alright and daddy looks at me. Uncle Bill takes a fiver from his wallet and tells me to get more lemonade and crisps but I say I'm too full, so he tells me to go and play the machines and I get change from the barman and play the slot machine while my daddy and uncle Bill talk quietly to each other.

Woods

Me and Sean went on an adventure today. We decided to walk out the back roads where the woods and the old cottage are. Sean said he was afraid because the cottage is supposed to be haunted but I think he's just scared in case his daddy finds out where he was. We took biscuits and lemonade from the house in case we got hungry and sneaked off. The woods were dark and full of noises like birds and water running somewhere but I wasn't scared. It reminded me of the dark cupboard in my room only miles bigger. I think Sean was scared because he started talking about bears and goblins but I told him those things only live in other countries. The old cottage had all its windows smashed and the padlock was busted off the door. Inside the cottage it was dusty and it made you sneeze just standing there. People's names were scratched all over the walls and when you walked the broken glass on the floor made a crunching sound under your feet. There was nothing in there but some empty cupboards and an old mattress which smelled of pee. I went back outside while Sean scratched his name on the wall. Round the back was a well which still had water in it. The water was dark and you couldn't tell how deep it was. All I could see in the water was the sky and my face looking back at me. I liked staring into the well and imagining what it would be like to sink down into it, right down to the centre of the earth. I was thinking like that when Sean came round and told me he wanted to go home for his tea. When we got back to our street Sean's mammy was already out looking for him. She caught us together and dragged Sean home. I could hear her telling Sean wait to your daddy hears about this.

Secret

Some days I pretend to go to school but hide in the garden shed instead. I stay there very quiet until I know everyone has gone and then sneak back into the house. I listened to hear the back door being shut twice which means mammy and daddy have both gone. I sneaked back into the house and made sure no one was in the living room or the kitchen then made myself a sandwich. Then I decided to go into mammy and daddy's bedroom to smell the nice things on mammy's dresser. I crept upstairs and as I got closer I could hear noises coming from the bedroom. I was afraid but I wanted to see what was there so I opened the door very quietly, in case it was a burglar and then I could sneak away and tell someone. But when I opened the door I saw mammy and daddy kissing on the bed except it wasn't daddy it was Mr Burke. mammy squealed what are you doing here and Mr Burke cursed. I pointed to Mr Burke and said what is he doing here and then mammy dragged me into the other room. She told me not to tell anyone what I saw, that it would be our wee secret and that she would get me anything I wanted as long as I promised not to tell. Ok I said and told her I wanted a new bike.

Bike

I didn't have to go to school today and I didn't have to hide in the garden shed either. When I got up there was a brand new bike waiting for me downstairs. It was big and shiny and had thick tyres just like a motorbike. There was a helmet too and when mammy put it on my head she put a finger to her lip and said, sshh, our secret. Then she said something about being careful but I didn't hear her because I had the helmet on and was off down the street. I started off slowly to get used to the new bike but it wasn't long before I was going faster and faster, and soon I felt like I wasn't on a bike at all but was flying down the street. I passed Sean's house and I could see Mr Burke peeking out from behind the curtains. I tried to wave to him but he just kept on hiding behind the curtains. I couldn't wait to show my present to Sean, who wasn't allowed a big boy's bike yet. But then I thought, if I told Sean the secret and he told Mrs Burke, then maybe he would get a new bike too.


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