Murray Lachlan-Young
This week鈥檚 poet, Murray Lachlan Young, has performed in many diverse situations: Mega festivals (and little ones), TV, film and theatre. From Shakespeare鈥檚 Globe to Speakers Corner via the main stage at Glastonbury. He has won over hostile crowds, been threatened with violence and even had to run for his life.
Murray shot to fame in the late 鈥90s after securing a one million pound record deal, the first spoken word artist to be given such a deal by the mainstream music industry. In an attempt to escape all the hype he hightailed it to Italy, then lived in Paris and Sussex before settling in Cornwall with his family.
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鈥淒og Poo Poem鈥
This is a Public Service Announcement from the 成人快手.
Old Mr Milligan walking down the lane
Slipped on the mess of his own Great Dane.
Now he's in a bath chair looking rather sad,
Never would have happened if he'd put it in a bag.
Guide dog, gum dog, guard dog, stray.
Put it in the bag man, squirril it away.
Put it in your hat man, it'll keep you warm.
Keep it in your pocket on a frost bit morn.
Poor Mrs Harrison, slipped when she tripped,
off on the prom with her poodle toodle pip.
Didn't see dog mess, slipped off the quay,
Caught by a rip tide, swept out to sea.
Wolf Hound, blood hound, Pug, Pekingese,
Put it in the bag man, don't be a tease.
Inside, out, give a good, firm grab.
Put it in the bag man, put it in the bag.
So remember, in the event of your Chihuahua, Shitszu or Sausage dog fouling the footpath,
Don't be a cad, just put it in the bag.
鈥淥de to Goody鈥
Dearly beloved.
We are gathered here to mark the hopeful passing of the Jade Goody incident.
Though the painful loss of her celebrity bankability is still so raw in the hearts and minds of her agent and business associates,
we may take solace in the parable of St Mel of Gibson,
who's drunken anti-semitism was quickly glossed over with pseudo spiritual psychobabble and well scripted grovelling.
We also pray that she does not follow in the footsteps of the fallen ange, Barrymore of Rotoron.
So now let us give thanks to our all powerful spirit of media for giving us this cult of celebrity and the hours of engaging contact it has provided for our consumption.
Yet though I walk in the shadow of the valley of light entertainment, I shall fear no self realisation.
Ego to ego, much distrust, bring on the next one, in telly we trust.
Please Please Please can I have a copy of the dog poo poem it said every thing Ive ever wanted to say about dog poo.
Complain about this postIm currently volunteering for a local charity and we are looking for ways to stop people from letting their pooches poop on a play ground we have developed. I think this poem is the weapon weve been looking for.
Please send a copy of that terrific dog-poop poem to the mayor of Ventnor, the dog-fouling capital of the isle of Wight!
Complain about this postOn the subject of knitting people might like to know about Knit a River - (https://www.wateraid.org.uk/uk/get_involved/campaigns/take_action_now/help_save_lives_help_knit_a_river/default.asp), a Water Aid project that closes in March. You just have to knit a small (15 cm) blue square and it gets joined to lots more to make a huge long blue river.
Complain about this postSue
(nothing to do with any of the organizations involved)