Paper Monitor
12:16 UK time, Thursday, 27 November 2008
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Everybody gets tired, even the men and women who produce this nation's newspapers.
Some days there are juicy stories that they would normally relish but can't seem to get going with. Today's is the revelation that high heels for babies are being marketed.
What better illustration could there be of the terminal social decline of the UK, if not the Western world? Yet it all seems rather flat.
The Daily Express talks of shoes that "sexualise" but then tails off a bit. All the Sun can muster is the fashion editor writing: "Most of us would rather let our little girls be cute and innocent while they can rather than dressing them up like adults as soon as they are born."
And even the Daily Mail is only slightly better, warning: "Horrified mothers see them as a new low in the campaign to sexualise infants not old enough to know what is happening to them."
What is the world of news coming to when righteous indignation is in such short supply? Next thing they'll be blaming it on the credit crunch.
But the credit crunch obviously isn't having too much of an effect at Guardian Towers. They apparently have their own satellite in orbit. Page 13 of today's paper says they have located the hijacked Sirius Star off the coast of Somalia.
The subhead says "Guardian satellite tracks down Saudi supertanker". What does it do with its satellite the rest of the time, Paper Monitor wonders? Ah, but the second paragraph reveals the truth - "a satellite commissioned by the Guardian". So disappointing.
Over in G2, some of the country's leading thinkers tackle the burning issue of the day. Namely, why is Mamma Mia so good? Although, inexplicably, all these leading thinkers have one thing in common apart from an appreciation of the fastest selling DVD ever: they're all women. Novelists Jeanette Winterson and Naomi Alderman are fans. So is the Guardian's inhouse feminist Julie Bindel. She reveals the film made her happy for the first time in her life. According to Wikipedia, Julie Bindel was born in 1962.
Elsewhere in the papers, there's much about the sad demise of Woolworths. It leaves Paper Monitor misty-eyed over its formative singles-buying experiences, before progressing on to the infinitely cooler (although now long gone) Our Price.
Reminiscences of first Woolworths single purchases can be placed using the comments field below.
The 
Comment number 1.
At 27th Nov 2008, Andydisestablishment wrote:Does any one else have fond memories of sifting through the reduced price singles bin where, for every week a single had been out of the top 40, it would drop 50p in price? Never once bough a single that was actually in the chart ...
Complain about this comment (Comment number 1)
Comment number 2.
At 27th Nov 2008, Kaylie wrote:I remember trying to buy an album from Runcorn Woolies and being told that they didn't stock them any more. Cue bemused look from me and the timid suggestion that they might be thinking of LPs rather than albums. But the emphatic reassertion that they did not stock albums (even though the poster behing their head rather indicated they did) had me scurrying from the shop and heading off to find a proper music shop. Great selection of sweets though.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 2)
Comment number 3.
At 27th Nov 2008, chocolatieclair wrote:I remember buying every single from the top ten for months at a time. My addition was thankfully cured by the closure of my local Woolies.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 3)
Comment number 4.
At 27th Nov 2008, newda898 wrote:Haven't bought anything from Woolies since January, and before that, I can't remember the last thing I bought there!
Complain about this comment (Comment number 4)
Comment number 5.
At 27th Nov 2008, EvoRacer wrote:Wollies sounded it's own deathknell when it stopped selling pick'n'mix.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 5)
Comment number 6.
At 27th Nov 2008, badgercourage wrote:I bought my early singles at Kingstons in Beckeham - Woolies were uncool even in the 60s!
Complain about this comment (Comment number 6)
Comment number 7.
At 28th Nov 2008, diamondsuzywong wrote:I remember buying my first LP - 'The rise and fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars' by David Bowie, and my first single - I think it was 'Elected' by Alice Cooper. This would have been in about 1972 or 3, and the Woolies was (and is, for now) in Newport High Street on the Isle of Wight. Singles were 45p(?) and LPs a couple of ££.
I still have the LP! and I am now 48 (just).
Complain about this comment (Comment number 7)
Comment number 8.
At 28th Nov 2008, Tony Doyle wrote:I've just realised that not only was the first single I ever bought, was actually purchased from Woolies. I won't name it as I will sound rather 'sad' (I was 10), and it was the Rap named after the football club I supports' ground... Craig Johnston & John Aldridge have a lot to answer for...
Complain about this comment (Comment number 8)
Comment number 9.
At 28th Nov 2008, Caroline_says wrote:I'm sure that I remember singles sold in Woolies in two versions- one sung by the famous artist and another- the same song but sung by someone you've never heard of. However, it seems that no one I know shares this memory- can anyone confirm that this really happened?
Complain about this comment (Comment number 9)