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Caption competition results

13:16 UK time, Friday, 13 October 2006

It's time for the caption competition results.

This week we asked you to put words to a picture of Maverick, the American Short Hair Silver Classic Tabby, playing with his laptop at the 4th Annual Cat Championship held in New York.

cat.203.jpg

The winning entries are:

1 Lee Pike
I wish these '8 out of 10 cat' surveys were simpler to complete.

2 Mike
Always speak to your internet date on the phone before arranging a meet.

3 Tim Knott
Culprit in Internet phishing scandal found.

4 MJF
'Yo. I'm Dave Cameron's cat and I'm just like you.'

5 Sue Lee
CCTV footage finally cleared Ken in accounts of visiting obscene rodent websites.

6 Brian Ritchie
The cause of the systems crash at Battersea Dogs' ³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ is revealed.

Due to a technical hitch, some of the non-winners cannot be published this week.


Comments

  1. At 06:12 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Cate wrote:

    It's just work, work, work. Why can't I go out there with the other kitties?

  2. At 06:22 PM on 12 Oct 2006, SJ RAMMA wrote:

    I've got the best job in the world I get paid to sit and play cat and mouse all day - puurfect!

  3. At 06:27 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Adam wrote:

    Caption Comp:

    Q) Pantomime for the 21st Century - A) Puss re-boots

  4. At 06:34 PM on 12 Oct 2006, chris wrote:

    Just how do I press Ctrl+Alt+Del with these paws ?

  5. At 06:41 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Natasha wrote:

    I'm the one who wanted to buy YouTube, Google are just copy cats

  6. At 06:42 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Michael Daw wrote:

    The prototype bio-remote-controlled mouse enters the training phase.

  7. At 07:05 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Phil, Cardiff wrote:

    "Help me, I can't find the 'Enlarge Image" option!"

  8. At 07:07 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Sean Smith wrote:

    Tibby goes online for his lives insurance.

  9. At 07:08 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Beverly wrote:

    Don't tell me my dad has blocked catchow.com....

  10. At 07:11 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Phil, Cardiff wrote:

    "I just beat your MineSweeper high score."

    Or "I just beat your high score" if MineSweeper is a prohibited brand name.

  11. At 07:12 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Phil, Cardiff wrote:

    "I set up "MewTube" this morning, and now they're offering me $1bn in Google shares!"

  12. At 07:14 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Stig wrote:

    Tomkins, when I asked you to get some kit for the new office...

  13. At 07:19 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Alan wrote:

    Puss in Boots caught hacking into ogre.com

  14. At 07:20 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Stig wrote:

    Tom, it's an email in from Jerry. Once you get the dent out of it, can he have the frying pan back?

  15. At 07:24 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Sam Kleeman wrote:

    Here is the new and upcoming version of Windows: Microsoft Windows Vista FE (Feline Edition)

  16. At 07:25 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Pat wrote:

    The next time you let the dog use this thing, PLEASE make him clean up the slobber!

  17. At 07:26 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Carolyn wrote:

    If one more pillock asks me if I'm phishing...

  18. At 07:26 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Kip wrote:

    Cuts in the NHS lead to confusion in the order for the new CAT scanner.

  19. At 07:28 PM on 12 Oct 2006, adele opie wrote:

    Silver surfer.

  20. At 07:30 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Pix6, Vienna wrote:

    "Helpline? I pressed 'pause' and you'll never guess what happened!"

  21. At 07:32 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Helene Parry wrote:

    Maverick checks his profile on MiceSpace.

  22. At 07:35 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Susan wrote:

    Maverick uses "Firefox" for his Browser - he feels all four-legged creatures should support each other!

  23. At 07:40 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Stig wrote:

    It says I'm "going to have a lucky day because a black cat will cross my path". Oooh, hope it's Sheila from number 47...

  24. At 07:41 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Ian Brooks wrote:

    "After Ernst Blofeld's death at the hands of James Bond, his cat was forced to take over the leadership of Spectre"

  25. At 07:54 PM on 12 Oct 2006, sally armitage wrote:

    Yahoo!! I've caught the mouse!

  26. At 07:55 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Sean Smith wrote:

    Whiskas...8 out of 10 owners said that their cat preferred IT.

  27. At 07:59 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Tony Doyle wrote:

    Yes, that's right, there have been 3 other annual cat championships...

  28. At 08:04 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Derek Behan wrote:

    " My opponents are computer-illiterates - they've asked me if I could get them some "Spam" as a change from "Whiskas"!

  29. At 08:17 PM on 12 Oct 2006, simon wrote:

    Labour MP Sion Simon decides to use an expert to set up his web blog after his own disastrous efforts!

  30. At 08:20 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Simon wrote:

    And as soon as you look away I'm going to 'paws' the programme!

  31. At 08:38 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Reuben wrote:

    Pause? I thought you said Paws.

  32. At 08:42 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Linda wrote:

    Cheat - What do you mean I have not pressed image enhancer I'm this handsome naturally

  33. At 08:45 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Stig wrote:

    Right, that's our lads organised for the opening night of Crufts, who else can we get along for the streak?

  34. At 08:51 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Hal Coyle wrote:

    Little did Maverick suspect that sexy sounding chatroom user 'QTKitten' was undercover police dog Rex.

  35. At 08:58 PM on 12 Oct 2006, James wrote:

    The mastermind behing YouTube revealed.

  36. At 09:18 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Geo wrote:

    Though getting on in years, Tabby discovered there was more than one way to play at the old cat and mouse game.

  37. At 09:20 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Robin Landsbert wrote:

    Caption Comp

    Professor McGonagall discovers the delights of Muggle technology.

  38. At 09:26 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Candace wrote:

    Maverick was just about to enter the final launch sequence for the doggie neutraliser missile when the Labrador broke down the door.

  39. At 09:27 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Stig wrote:

    Calm down Maverick, we've only blocked p-h-i-s-h-i-n-g emails…

  40. At 09:31 PM on 12 Oct 2006, wrote:

    Just find my best side on my webcam, and right click, capture, hotornot.com here i come...

  41. At 09:33 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Stig wrote:

    And in this room we are conducting an experiment to see whether an infinite number of cats can write a Jeffrey Archer novel. It's not going too bad so far. Tiddles here is on duty this week...

  42. At 09:42 PM on 12 Oct 2006, wrote:

    Meowzilla Firefox 1.5 features tabbied browsing.

  43. At 09:54 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Stig wrote:

    Ah, Scaramanga, you have returned unexpectedly...

  44. At 10:07 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Tony Doyle wrote:

    This week's caption competiton has an added claws...

  45. At 10:43 PM on 12 Oct 2006, G Amey wrote:

    Maverick never did any work on his laptop. He just liked playing with mice.

  46. At 10:50 PM on 12 Oct 2006, G Amey wrote:

    Mav's blogging skills were fantastic. He was a real cat o' nine tales.

  47. At 10:58 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Steve Muldoon wrote:

    I used to be a city trader until "fat paw" syndrome lost me my job...

  48. At 11:01 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Helene Parry wrote:

    AOL instals purr-'n'-tail guidance.

  49. At 11:10 PM on 12 Oct 2006, MIssB wrote:

    A Maverick for Online Gambling...

  50. At 11:11 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Brett, Manchester wrote:

    Good afternoon, my names Maverick, how can I help you today.

  51. At 11:58 PM on 12 Oct 2006, Tony Doyle wrote:

    I used to be Top Gun you know...

  52. At 12:42 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Kevin Riggs wrote:

    Hey Ginger, it's good news. It's not Rabies its hair-balls.

  53. At 01:12 AM on 13 Oct 2006, jazz wrote:

    And thats what happens when you buy mice off ebay

  54. At 02:30 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Candace wrote:

    Puss reboots

  55. At 04:32 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Maggie wrote:

    Curses... my secret life as Paper Monitor is out.

  56. At 05:31 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Helene Parry wrote:

    AOL installs purr-'n'-tail guidance.

  57. At 05:59 AM on 13 Oct 2006, MCK wrote:

    Call centre staff worried by a new wave in outsourcing.

  58. At 06:10 AM on 13 Oct 2006, wrote:

    "Computer says meow"

  59. At 06:32 AM on 13 Oct 2006, N Willing wrote:

    You've heard of Puss-in-Boots. This is Puss-in-Dixons.

  60. At 06:38 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Helene Parry wrote:

    Pause-Help-Tab-Control-³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ-Page

  61. At 06:47 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Helene Parry wrote:

    Tab! Shift!

  62. At 06:58 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Rooke wrote:

    Wednesday: Attended cat show, had photo taken writng blog, hairball...

  63. At 07:01 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Rooke wrote:

    Oi Charlie, they're out of sparrows, what'd you want instead?

  64. At 07:11 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Andy Phillips wrote:

    "Not the sort of mouse that I was expecting"

  65. At 07:12 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Rooke wrote:

    A little help please. How can I press Alt-Ctrl-Del with these paws?

  66. At 07:35 AM on 13 Oct 2006, N Willing wrote:

    I guess the litter tray is the "recycle bin". This is going to be tricky.

  67. At 07:44 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Rooke wrote:

    Er, should the battery be smoking like that?

  68. At 08:09 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Dick Hill wrote:

    Hickory Dickory Dock
    The cat ran up the telephone bill

  69. At 08:17 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Rooke wrote:

    Basically it's an exposee of sex, drugs and corruption on the catwalk of the professional cat showing circuit.

  70. At 08:18 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Jim wrote:

    Call centre staff face new threat.

  71. At 08:18 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Mal Walker wrote:

    "Blog Mog Top Dog"

  72. At 08:18 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Michael Brown wrote:

    The best thing about the internet is that no one else knows you are a cat!

  73. At 08:26 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Nigel Macarthur wrote:

    I'm offered holidays, viagra, financial advice...! Never any blasted cat food!

  74. At 08:29 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Lynne wrote:

    I've had bigger mice than this!

  75. At 08:42 AM on 13 Oct 2006, MCK wrote:

    A fat cat at the start of his career

  76. At 08:48 AM on 13 Oct 2006, stella alvarez wrote:

    So I said to the owl "if you really love me, you'll get me a laptop"

  77. At 08:48 AM on 13 Oct 2006, stella alvarez wrote:

    paper monitor's identity is revealed

  78. At 08:51 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Andrew Pedley wrote:

    As Network administrator, Maverick was a hot favourite to win.

  79. At 08:52 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Steve wrote:

    When I was young they ran around on their own!

  80. At 08:53 AM on 13 Oct 2006, James Castle wrote:

    Medical advances continue with the breakthrough of the first online CAT scan.

  81. At 08:54 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Rachel wrote:

    I'm a cat. I can't spell. I asked Santa for a lap.....

  82. At 08:56 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Gareth Jones, Anglesey wrote:

    Great idea ! Internet Videos for cats...think I'll call it MiewTube

  83. At 09:04 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Alan wrote:

    Exercise ... Exercise ... Don't give me that 'ball of wool' speech again!

  84. At 09:05 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Gareth Jones, Anglesey wrote:

    HMV unveils it's 21stC e-logo

  85. At 09:05 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Gareth Jones, Anglesey wrote:

    The new Apple Mac-avity

  86. At 09:07 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Kat wrote:

    Exposed: Monitor readers discover the real identity of MM.

  87. At 09:08 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Gareth Jones, Anglesey wrote:

    ...so Spellchecker is hold down Alt then press F4 right?

  88. At 09:10 AM on 13 Oct 2006, wrote:

    'I was on witch.com and called the woman a fake.'

  89. At 09:16 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Mark Wrighton wrote:

    Maverick the cat: "Difficult? No, I'm used to playing with a mouse. Its that Ctrl-Alt-Del stuff that I am having serious trouble with"

  90. At 09:19 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Sue Lee wrote:

    ...and ven I enter zee pazzvurd, like zo, zen zee whole of zee canine vurld vill be viped out....

  91. At 09:21 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Graham Harris wrote:

    Owner trains cat to order its food.

  92. At 09:22 AM on 13 Oct 2006, wrote:

    Humphrey posts 'rumours of my death have been greatly exaggerated' on youtube.

  93. At 09:26 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Rooke wrote:

    Oi Herbert, you and Gordon up for some catawalling?

  94. At 09:27 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Algo wrote:

    "Cat for sale. Excellent mouser."

    "One outsourcing project too many?"

    You should have had a sweepstake for how many "Cat and Mouse" entries you get!

  95. At 09:28 AM on 13 Oct 2006, David wrote:

    Ginger thought the re-spray had been less than successful

  96. At 09:28 AM on 13 Oct 2006, John Franks wrote:

    GRROFF it's my mouse

  97. At 09:29 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Peter Dean wrote:

    Caption Competition:

    NO - I said get me a new TAB KEY!

  98. At 09:32 AM on 13 Oct 2006, George wrote:

    There is more than one way to go phishing.

  99. At 09:34 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Mike wrote:

    The true identity of Paper Monitor is finally revealed.

  100. At 09:36 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Pete Hazell wrote:

    "Well, now that Mr Whittington has passed away, I wonder if I could Google Mr Livingstone??"

  101. At 09:42 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Catherine O wrote:

    Oh boy, I really wish I hadn't Googled that Schrödinger guy.

  102. At 09:43 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Pix6, Vienna wrote:

    Hey Tibbles! There's a new load of catnip on Ebay. What should I bid?

  103. At 09:44 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Matt King wrote:

    Professor McGonagall just couldn't work out the Emailius spell.

  104. At 09:46 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Bert Fletcher wrote:

    Tell me again, What does this paws button do?

  105. At 09:52 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Dave Love wrote:

    Look ... I'll purr contentedly on your lap AFTER I've updated my blog, OK?

  106. At 10:00 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Bernard Ledwith wrote:

    Well, Now I've set up my webmog let's hope it gets a lot of hits.

  107. At 10:01 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Mark Starling wrote:

    "Yes Mr Bush, I have to use a voice synthesizer but North Korea really do have nuclear weapons. Yours Kim...."

  108. At 10:04 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Paul R wrote:

    Forget You Tube, I'm on Zoo Tube

  109. At 10:07 AM on 13 Oct 2006, wrote:

    Net closes in on phishing suspect.

  110. At 10:08 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Paul R wrote:

    Mwa ha ha ha, little do they know I'm selling the neighbours dog on Ebay.

  111. At 10:12 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Paul R wrote:

    Please enter your password to Mogg-on to your account.

  112. At 10:14 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Chairman Meow wrote:

    9/10 silver surfers prefer a hot tin roof.

  113. At 10:16 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Paul R wrote:

    Yes! I've just crashed the Crufts website

  114. At 10:18 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Nigel Macarthur wrote:

    Spam? I'd rather have rabbit flavour, but it'll do.

  115. At 10:23 AM on 13 Oct 2006, RICHARD MAIR wrote:

    Caption competition:

    "Is there an 'h' in whiskas?"

  116. At 10:24 AM on 13 Oct 2006, David Murray wrote:

    I prefer lap top to gold top

  117. At 10:29 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Neil wrote:

    "Right, next one to make a godawful mouse gag gets signed up to the ³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ News Alert service. I'm warning you!"

  118. At 10:30 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Nigel Bell wrote:

    It wasn't quite what Maverick was expecting from pursionkitty.com.

  119. At 10:40 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Jim wrote:

    The 'paws button' joke was starting to wear a little thin.

  120. At 10:40 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Alan Gifford wrote:

    Can't I get ant privacy? I'm doing the Caption Competition!

  121. At 10:45 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Jim wrote:

    Without an opposable thumb, the alt-tab shuffle takes too long, and Maverick is caught buying sardines on E-bay.

  122. At 10:46 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Tom Feilding wrote:

    Cat and mouse (sorry I know it is too obvious)

  123. At 10:46 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Tom Coward wrote:

    Non-discrimination in the workplace.... Where will it end??

  124. At 10:55 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Tom Feilding wrote:

    Maverick never did work out how to use a laptop when he did not have a lap.

  125. At 10:56 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Mike Grimes wrote:

    ...meanwhile at the Dell battery testing facility.

  126. At 11:00 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Karl Walde wrote:

    "Exshpext you to talk?, no Mishter Bond I exshpect you to die"

  127. At 11:01 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Rooke wrote:

    It's just as well normal ³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ taste and decency rules apply otherwise we'd never hear from Graham Norton, Chris Moyles or that nice Mr Ross.

  128. At 11:06 AM on 13 Oct 2006, David wrote:

    Mouse-click cat-trick for super quick Maverick

  129. At 11:08 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Sean Smith wrote:

    The reason for the missing caption competition entries remains a mystery.

  130. At 11:09 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Pete Lemon wrote:

    "On the internet, nobody knows you're a cat!"

  131. At 11:11 AM on 13 Oct 2006, F Grimes wrote:

    Your call is important to us.

  132. At 11:14 AM on 13 Oct 2006, andrew wrote:

    ''Frankly, you're rubbish at the caption competition. So this week, I'm doing it, OK?''

  133. At 11:16 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Kerry wrote:

    Playing Cat and Mouse isn't like it was when I was a lad

  134. At 11:20 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Nii Kpani Addy wrote:

    ...and the pussycat dolls thought they were hip.

  135. At 11:21 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Louisa Maguire wrote:

    I know I posted my video on You Tube where is it ?

  136. At 11:24 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Dale Whitaker wrote:

    "OK, Blofeld. The white cat is history. This is where I take over!"

  137. At 11:28 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Brian Saxby wrote:

    The selection process for winning caption competition entries is finally revealed

  138. At 11:28 AM on 13 Oct 2006, StevenS wrote:

    Maverick had started leaving photos of his dismembered kills for his owner

  139. At 11:34 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Martin Grimble wrote:

    Maverick carried out his Friday task for the ³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ of selecting the best five captions.

  140. At 11:42 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Tony Holden wrote:

    While on holiday, Mrs. Slocombe left the running of the Grace Brothers web site to her trusted companion.

  141. At 11:47 AM on 13 Oct 2006, Kip wrote:

    It says here "Mars orbiter looks down on Rover." Yeah, well so do I!

  142. At 12:04 PM on 13 Oct 2006, David Starkey wrote:

    Microsoft unviels protection for new Windows Vista

  143. At 12:12 PM on 13 Oct 2006, anne r wrote:

    The brains behind the Paper Monitor are finally revealed.

  144. At 12:14 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Paul R wrote:

    8 out of 10 hackers said there cat's preferred I.T.

  145. At 12:14 PM on 13 Oct 2006, sarah, ts, italy wrote:

    Paws for thought.

  146. At 12:16 PM on 13 Oct 2006, David Olorenshaw wrote:

    I want to learn programming in Purrl!

  147. At 12:17 PM on 13 Oct 2006, sarah, ts, italy wrote:

    Pause for thought.

  148. At 12:18 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Sparky wrote:

    I knew if I searched for long enough I'd find the purr-fect laptop... Pity this mouse isn't edible though!

  149. At 12:18 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Fiona wrote:

    At registration Maverick grabbed a chance to google "How to avoid the 5th Annual Cat Championship"

  150. At 12:18 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Andy Nicholson wrote:

    caption competition:
    Internet Mouser

  151. At 12:20 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Martin Bentley wrote:

    [CTRL]+[ALT]+[DEL] Puss Reboots.

  152. At 12:20 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Paul R wrote:

    Tiddles search for Cat Stevens on I-Tunes wasn't going well.

  153. At 12:21 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Paul R wrote:

    Dear Mr Lloyd Webber, please find attached my CV, I feel I have all the relevant experience for the vacant position in your musical Cats....

  154. At 12:22 PM on 13 Oct 2006, grahame blanchard wrote:

    Paws for thought

  155. At 12:24 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Jel wrote:

    You mean to say this isn't the Cat-ion Competition?

  156. At 12:24 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Simon Sullivan wrote:

    "One Cat? But Mr Cameron's policy advisors specifically asked for an infinite number of monkeys."

  157. At 12:30 PM on 13 Oct 2006, Neil Branscombe wrote:


    "I,m trying to e-mail Mr Schrodinger to tell him that I am in fact alive."

This post is closed to new comments.

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