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Chris,

Enjoy your "break". You know where to come for any further "guidance"...

Nic

x

I'm here. Where's everybody else?

I'm lurking - its strange having a boss in the office again

Awww, Chris, I know this sounds really pathetic, but I am going to miss you so much next week! This morning, I felt just awful with a cold, but then you played The Candy Man, and everything seemed just fine!

Enjoy your week, have fun!

Love, Chrissie xx

Ah, Christophe, you may have seen my previous missive regarding you orft on your hols...I've only just (the last two days) had the pleasure of hearing your new show...and now you're not gonna be here for a week...but I bet you've been working like a Trojan, so you defiantly need this break I reckon!!!

Let's hope the rest of the 'not on the air' peeps don't have to work too hard eh...and you have a lovely time!!!

we had a lovely time the day we went to Bangor
love
hazel
x

hey boy, hey girl...

Have a good one Chris and Gang, you will be missed but I am that Alice bloke will do a good job keeping your seat warm. Don't work too hard next week.

I hate to be pedantic but the line is "Take care of you", seen the film a million times - that's why I'm still single as I want the fairytale!

Have a great Blog Meet tomorrow, look forward to seeing the pictures on FB xx

AliB
xx

Pessees CHRIS, CHRIS, CHRIS!!! I just have to say, I'm SO pleased you kept 'Pause for Thought', so many thanks for that...was lovely this morning...thank you x

Carl: we have missed you! We've been saying for DAYS now - "where is Uncle Carl????"

Baggy: glad to hear things are going ok with the boss!

C xx

Hi CLP - have a great week off - you will be missed - could you do a mini hello blog midweek so we dont have too many "next"s to do? Bet you still wake up at silly o'clock too!

Hazel love - glad you are popping in a bit more these days - you must be on the mend!

AliB - you hold out for the fairy tale - you are worth it!

Chrissie from last blog - not drinking cept at the Glasgow meet - one glass of chards and you'll be steemin!

Me - I am remaining in training - starts tonight and continues in Londres tomorrow(other unspecified capital cities available) LOL Rips - nutter!

Right just had a world FIRST in this house - eaten beans on toast for lunch and not spilled a bean!!

(might spill beans tomorrow though! LOL)

back in a bit
debs
X

Welcome back UC. So much happened when you weren't here yesterday ;-)

CLP have a nice break, we will miss you in the mornings.

mtd ffb xxx

UC - I'm glad you're back, some nutter highjacked your login!

HL - Great to see you back, hope the move goes well for you and the Badger xx

Debs - Bless you, I might have to watch Pretty Woman again over the weekend.

On that note has anyone seen Valentines Day? There is a brilliant bit at the end involving Julia Roberts as she is driven down Rodeo Drive - made me chuckle.

AliB
xx

Big Chief CLP
Go enjoy the well deserved
Have a long sit in a darkened room
See you on the other side . . .
DtM x

I feel there is something I should bring to your attention.

I'm not a bitter person, as everyone who reads this blog will know. I'm kind-hearted, warm and fun to be around (oh hang on, that's not me, that's Bingo. Sorry).

I'm an extraordinarily bitter person, as anyone who reads this blog will know. Howver sometimes, that bitterness is justified as I'm sure you will doubtless agree after reading this. I've always been a supporter of CLP, since the days of Too Much Pudding, The Big Brunch and Don't Forget Whatever It Was You Were Supposed To Remember and no-one was happier for him than I was when he got the Radio 2 Breakfast Show gig.

But since then Chris , you've changed. You've changed.

All my Twitter conversations - ignored. All my brillant ideas for TV shows - not so much as an acknowledgment. And to top it all - the straw that finally broke the camel's back- my idea for Snooker to be the next Sporting Challenge, stolen and passed off as your own.

Enough's enough. Tomorrow morning, in the Daily Ma....errr `unspecified newspaper', you'll read my story, `I pulled Chris Evans back up the Showbiz Ladder - and he stamped on my fingers' (with accompanying pictures, one of Chris looking like an axe-wielding maniac from his Radio 1 days and one of me looking like I've just turned down the £250,000 box on Deal Or No Deal in favour of the 1p one). This will be followed shortly by my autobiography - The Man Who Wasn't There - detailing how a hitherto uneventful existence was cruelly shattered by the callous actions of one of Britain's biggest celebrities.

In the meatime Chris, I hope you use your week off to reflect on the damage you've done to one of your most loyal (and possibly most deluded) fans. Hopefully you'll feel that I deserve an apology.

You can read whether I accept that apology in my new column in Hiya! magazine. It's out Tuesday.

Afternoon each

CLP - have a lovely week. great timing for your hols. I am also off work for a week next week so shan`t (sp?) be listening in the morning so wont miss you...although i do like that Alice bloke so will miss him instead..make sense? nah, not to me either!

Hello everyone.. have been up to my ears and other regions in the job wot i am paid to do. How very dare they?!

Have pretty much kept up but not had time to even say hello (sad face..) and now i`m offski for a wk.

Unfortunately finances dictate that i`m not able to get to either the London or Glasgae meets (despite being off BOTH sats!) so in advance to everyone going..please have a wonderful time and we(the other absentees!) will await reports with relish (and NO editing please!)

Hugs to those that need them, best wishes to the others and a woohoo for anyone who wants one!

Be good...back on the 8th!

mSc x

Scoobs

I'll have a woohoo - thanks. Have a great week off, enjoy.

AliB
xx

LOL UC.

mtd ffb xxx

#13
who said that?

debs
X

Have a good week off. Looking forward to your return on March 8th. The video this week was good - you both looked so cold in the water. Bloggers, hope you have a good time tomorrow at your meeting.

Afternoon gang

CLP - have a wonderful "week off" whatever you're up to. These off-air working holidays are becoming a bit of a habit - are you off on another book tour!? I'm at home during the day if you want to ring for a chat ...!!

So, 2 interviews this morning and I am cream-crackered. I think they both went alright, feel more drawn to the first one (PA to 2 Directors), but basically, I'vegiven it my best shot and now it's down to the wonders of short-listing and second interviews.

I think a stint of Desperate Housewives is on the cards this afternoon. No meal to prepare today as my lovely wonderful man is cooking this evening.

Whatever you're up to - have a fantastic weekend, and see some of yous in London tomorrow afternoon/evening.

Love, stuff and huggles galore.

Deevs

x

There was me thinking that CLP wasn't trying to emulate Sir Tel, and then after a couple weeks on air, he's off on 'hols!!'

Ahh, well, all good things...

Been a really good week this week CLP - shame to lose momentum now as you really seem to have hit your stride now.

Still, have a good week everyone!

Afternoon (morning!) all,

Hope you have a lovely week off CLP, whatever you're doing. Try and find some chill out time though you've been working really hard!

Has been a funny old week round here so not much time for catching up - apologies... so will just say hello and have great weekends everyone, hope those that are meeting have a fab time (bit envious of that - I WILL make it to one, one day!)

Dragonxx

#13 Carl - If only our I.T. was as funny as you, they might laugh when I tell them that I spend ages on here all day...or possibly not....?

Nic

Ahoy ahoy!

MsScoobycat - You didn't think that we would notice you being off at the same time as CLP eh? I sahall be keeping a close eye on the tabloids.

Deev - I hope Nic doesn't catch this bloke!

UC - we are not worthy!

Ali - I love what you said about the fairy tale and for some reason it shot this into my tiny brain. Don't know why but I thought I'd put it on here! It's at the end of one of my favourite films Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.
Gene Wilder says
"But Charlie, don't forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he always wanted."

Charlie Bucket "What happened?"

Willy Wonka "He lived happily ever after"

I just want to go home and watch that now.

Sorry...normal service will be resumed shortly *sigh*

Rips

x

Rips - See previous blog for reference to sarcasm...;O)

Nic

P.S. Can you tell I am totally tiddled off with the Tax pack...

Hi All
I'll miss you in the mornings next week CLP and hope that you have a good week 'off'

Fingers crossed for you Deevs.

Have a great weekend in the Big Smoke everyone that is going, there was an outside chance that I may have been able to pop in for a cheeky beer tomorrow afternoon but that has now been scuppered by my son needing me to be somewhere with him!

UC- - I think I love you!

Have a great weekend one and all


Beany

Flip!

Rips

x

Good afternoon all

UC - brilliant, perhaps you could go to the small claims court? I believe they are usually very biased towards those who are claiming!
AliB - love your woohoo reply. But really really love your line and your fairytale tale! Abs right to wait for the fairytale - all princesses deserve nothing better.
Rips - Awwww, how lovely. Perhaps normal service should not resume!!!
Deev - well done today and hope you get some good news about the one you want soon.

For anyone interested on this radio 2 blog - watching Simon on R5 streaming live, so you can watch and listen....all good fun, although it could be argued that this is called TV so maybe nothing new!!!

Chris have a good week, hope you get all your work done! Happy Friday everyone and for all those heading into London for a meet, have fun!

dreamer
xx

Carl: absolutely love your post, really had me laughing! And reminded me of something I wrote at school (a hundred and ten years ago) when I was editor of my own "Mountains out of Molehills" magazine. I would hand out pieces of paper to my school pals saying things like "David Cassidy Sneezes! David Essex wears a shirt! - Read all about it in Mountains out of Molehills magazine - out Monday!" Well, it was quite funny at the time ... but nowhere near as funny as you!

I hope your column in Hiya! causes Mr Evans to think on!

Scoobs: hope you have a lovely week off - a whole NINE days to look forward to! Not to worry about the Glasgow meet, there will be another, I am sure - and of course, I am sincerely hoping there will be a Return to Liverpool later this year!

C xx


C xx

ChrissieS - sent you a message on fb...!!!
dreamer
xx

Dreamer,

I disagree - It's not good for my hard man image to go around telling the world that my favourite films include.
A children's movie
A cartoon
and a film starring the man I have crush on....

What am I doing?!

Rips

x

Dreamer: I will try to find it!

xx

Rips - you have a crush on Gene Wilder??? Good question...What are you doing???

No need to reply

dreamer
xx

Scoobs - have a lovely week off!

Ali - you shouldn't accept anything less than the fairytale! Have just found mine and its worth waiting for :)

All those going to London - have a good time and have a drink or three for me (preferably ones with alcohol in!)

Off to Brum to see GG this evening, can't wait. Back home tomorrow for family birthday - all go!

AS x

ChrissieS - haha!! I sent a copy to Mary just in case!!!
x

Rips - you poor little disalusioned (sp) lamb you

Hard man my @rse! soft as putty you mate - I know I've grabbed you on a few occasions!

running, running......

anon
X

Dreamer seeing as you're not abusing me today, I will reply ;^p

Jude Law is the only man for me!

Rips

x

Who drinks beer and loves rugby just for the record. Grrrrrrr!

Rips - Do you have flu or something?

Nic
x

Haha!

I will have tomorrow and Sunday Nic.

Rips

x

Rips - Gareth Thomas drinks beer and loves rugby!!

x

Dreamer - Now he is a real rugger b....oh, perhaps I best not say that ;~)

Nic

x

Dreamer: I have just replied to your FB message! Good grief, I'll just say that again: I have replied to a FB message - there's a first time for everything!

Think this calls for a celebration ... is Lent over yet?!

C xx

Yeah, and if he wasn't Welsh he'd be perfect!

No offence!

Rips

x

Allez Les Bleus!!!!!

Is who lent over yet?
I'm sat up straight!

Rips

x

LOL Nic!!! And Chrissie well done you!!! Lent? Get yourself onto the wine pronto! FB much more fun with wine! Sent you a wee reply! xx
Rips - you were doing so well not resuming normal service!
x

Afternoon each

Have a great time next week Chris, we'll miss you.

Good news: me little car is out of hospital and back where it belongs - wipers wiping like nobody's business. The garage is £250 better off.

Bad news: I have pluerisy (is that how it's spelled?). Have checked the antibiotic literature and it says nothing about red wine. Is there a doctor in the house?

xxxx

Oh, and PS: Have a great time in London. Is Tiggs going? I remember last year she had her laptop with her. So, if she is, could we have updates and photos please Tiggs? xxxx

And anyway it's not lent, it's borrowed...as me grammar used to say..

Nic

x

Annie - poor you! Especially after shelling out £250!!! Short answer is no! Alcohol with antibiotics makes no difference - the 1 exception is metronidazole - it makes you very sick, but this is an unusual antibiotic to get. Only side effect is drowsiness - think that oould be good though, sleep often best policy! Having said all of that your body is trying to heal and putting more toxins such as alcohol in it means it will have to work extra hard to get better. So the best advice is not to have any - but the odd glass will do no harm!
Take much care Annie.
dreamer
xx

Afternoon all

CLP have a good break!

And you Scoobs! (Co-incidence, eh?)

Rips, what are you on, and can I have some please?

Annie, you take care of yourself, sorry to hear of your trouble last night, and hope you can have a wee drink tonight.

Well, Mr JG has my cold now, and of course it's so much worse than when I had it! So he's taken to his bed, and not working, so my peaceful day tomorrow and evening tonight has gone for a burton!

Will catch you later when I'm home from this mad house...

JG x

Rips/Nic: yes, very funny!

Dreamer: re: wine - well, it will teach me for being so smug earlier today ... as Fagin would say: "I'm reviewing, the situation"!!

C xx

Oh dear Annie - sorry to hear that. I had it quite a while ago, so I know it's really not good at all. Hope you have a speedy recovery. Good news is, I've not had it reoccur in the last 15 years :-)

Forgot to mention earlier, I'm off on jury service for 2 weeks from Monday, so no blogging for me! "Off with his head!!"

'Reoccur'?? That's not a real word is it?!? Bong!

Of course, I meant 'recur' :-)

I am so remiss in replying to everyone - by the time I get to the bottom I've forgotten what I wanted to say. But, to all my pals Halloooooooo, hope you are all well and those who aren't, hope you'll feel better soon.

Dreamer: I'm going with your advice.

xxxx

Annie,

Not a great couple of days for you by the sound of it. Sending you some sympathy and a bit of good luck. Have some wine but maybeez not too much, eh!
Get betterer soonerer.

Nic

x

Dorset: I had it about 30 yrs ago, so not bad I suppose - twice in a lifetime. It's no nice, though. I blame the AA.

xxxx

Chrissie
#50 - I'm a bad 'un and a bad 'un I shall stay

its in the song love - fall off that wagon - after all there's only "3 wheels" on it!

debs
X

Thanks Nic, will have a very small glass to join FNWC.

Not a wonderful couple of days, but the upside is that my gorgeous daughter has been driving me around and we were ladies who lunched today. And - nobody died. I should count my blessings, there's much worse in the world.

Have a great time tomorrow with the mad lot.

xxxxx

Annie: sorry to hear you are going through the wars at the moment. I am sure you know this, but pleurisy can very easily become pneumonia, so please, take care ok? No running about after everyone this weekend: take it easy and let them run after you for a change! And, yes, Dreamer is right a wee glass of wine won't do any harm, probably do more good!

C xx

I just wanted to thank you all for your kind words of support in my hour of need - it's very much appreciated.

Sadly I won't be able to make it to the blog meet this weekend. I have a meeting tomorrow to discuss my new ITV2 show, `Uncle Carl - Relatively Speaking'. In it'll I'll be interviewing celebrities about some of the darker moments of their lives - first up is the actor Jude Law, who'll be telling me about living in fear of a mystery stalker carrying a rugby ball under one arm and a six-pack of lager under the other. On Sunday, I'll be meeting up with my new agent, a Mr. Clifford. He's already got me anew advertising campaign - `Thats why Uncles go to Iceland' and reckons I'm a dead cert for the jungle this year.


Once again, thank you all. Your love and support has been the only thing to get me through this particularly trying time. Please remember that in the future, as my fame reaches it's inevitable dizzying supernova height, my denying ever knowing any of you is not personal.

P.S. I think it's best I go back to not being here. Max reckons it's bad for business.

Oh Uncle Carl - you are a geni-i-o-us makes me smile every time - surprised you have time to work!

debs
X

Will do Chrissie. Gorgeous daughter will run after me and probably bring me a comic and a cup of tea. She remembers me doing that for her when she was little. Just hope it's Red magazine and not Jackie.

Good to hear you're feeling well after giving up the alcopops.

xxxxx

Can I visit your planet Uncle Carl?

xxxx

Happy Friday Everyone!!

Annie, sorry to hear you're poorly and about your experiences waiting in the cold. Take care of yourself and wrap up warm

Rips, was glad today that I work alone in my office! Trying to explain why I was laughing out loud would have had me carted off to an UNSPECIFIED place by some UNSPECIFIED people in UNSPECIFIED COLOUR coats!!

JG Hope you survive Mr JG's cold

HAS FNWC started yet? I don't want to get left behind

Seza xxx

#59 - We pale in to insignificance in the shadow of your talents. Brilliant!! LOL.

Nic

err...work? Oh 'eck, forgot about that....

Annie - not till you're better! Look after yourself :-)

Annie, You'll probably be able to soon.

Move over Planet Hollywood welcome Planet Uncle Carl.....

I'll probably get modded for this too!

Rips

x

Don't worry Rips. My ego will need it's own planet soon enough :-)

#69 Planet Uncle Carl Ego - PUCE?! Good job you're Carl and not Karl!

Nic

Annie - hope you're feeling bettererer soon hon xxxxx


Nic / Unc / Ripstickle - you three are reet on form this arvo! Keep it up boys!

Deevs

x

Cheryl, I think Carl's too high to keep it up and rips sounds like he has a bad case of flu, sapping his strength....

Nic

x

Oh and how rood of me - Annie sounds like you've had a reet couple of days - take it easy dearly - need you well for the blog me eh?

debs
X

Nic, it's no secret that my blog posts are being ghost-written while I spend time promoting my new `fragrance pour homme'.

It's called `Bull'. And of course I'll be wearing it myself - wherever I go, a whiff of Bull will follow.

Carl: love the sound of your new TV show - brilliant! Max Clifford is a tw*t, but bound to make you a small/large fortune!

Now, I do believe I said this a week ago: hope the London Meet is fantastic!

Have a great time everyone.

And to the rest of the bloggers - have a lovely weekend.

C xx

A holiday??!! Already???!!! All right for some I suppose!

Ooooooooh - Instant Restaurant now starting on Beeb2 ....... if you can, watch it ... !

Deevs

x

opps - alreasdy started on vodka - and still at work

play nicely everyone - I'm off done the pub!

Got it Deevs.

Oh, look - more bleedin' snow.

xxxx

Hello again

Ok washing done, elh visited, dinner about to be started, packing ummmm do it in the morning, nearly ready to join in FNWC yayeeee.

Annie - so sorry to hear you are poorly, especially after your experience last night. Enjoy your wine and keep warm.

Those of you meeting tonight - have fun. I'll see some of you at varicose points during tomorrow.

Laters


mtd ffb xxx

Well, time for me to call it a day. Have a great weekend and for those of you attending the London Meet - have a fantastic time!

Me, I'm off out again with my new showbiz chums, Vernon and Ashley. Good lads, but they really shouldn't ask me to hold their phones while they get the drinks in....

Ok, so I am watching Instant Restaurant but can you tell me what these numpties think they're doing?

To get people to appear on this, do they go out looking for people who've never cooked or been to restaurants?

Maybe I should go in for it!

Seza xx

See what I mean ...... classic!

Yesterday saw a student make pasta for the first time ever, with 10 people sitting waiting for their supper!

Unmissable!

Deevs

x

Do you think there is something in the rules that says they have to cook every main dish to order and not cook any of it in advance?

Glad to here the interviews went well, enjy your weekend

Seza xx

Seza/Deevs: Not very clever, were they?

On a cooking note - have tried Tesco, Asda and the local deli for puy lentils with no luck. Have everything else for my recipe. Can I use ordinary lentils instead?

xxxx

I've made it home through the rain (almost a song in there somewhere?)

Mr JG is a little better, but a bit grumpy, although to be fair, he'd be grumpy if he'd been at work!

Just thinking of something for tea, so have poured a glass of wine to help the thought processes ;)

Then will be settling down to watch the rugby!

JG x

Snow starting to lie yet again and it looks like more tomorrow. Just been watching the Scottish news - those poor souls in Auchterarder, Stonehaven and Inverness - it's time it was gone.

Did the wine help with the decision-making JG?

xxx

Yes Annie, very much so, have just ordered pizza's from the domi** -spotty place! I'm too exhausted to cook!

Been feeling very sorry for all the folks up there cut off and without power!

Just need to ring Mum, and pour another glass! Oh, better feed the dog as well! lol

JG x

Annie, horrible to hear about the bad weather all around. They're even forecasting floods locally and we're in dry old Essex

Hope you stay well

JG, I cooked fish and chicken but sent boy1 to get chips to go with them.

Was that very wrong of me? ;-)

Seza xx

Did someone say wine?

Seza you are lucky to have boys to run errands ;-). Yep - FNWC is officially open, well JG, me and Annie have started. I'm sure Beez, Gail, Baggy and Miss P are joining us from London.

We've got snow forecast for Sunday - that may mean it will take ages to get back from London....... oh well never mind, I'm on holiday on Monday as well......

mtd ffb xxx

JG: My lot have Dominos on speed dial!! Do you know how many calories there are in those pizzas??

Tasty, though, aren't they?

Seza: you sent a child out in the dark for chips?

xxx

In my defence Annie, it's not far, all well lit streets, it hadn't been dark very long and he went on his bike.

He's 13 now so if is late home from school, sometimes is almost as dark

Seza xx

Annie, I don't worry about the calories in the food when I'm drinking the amount of wine I intend to drink tonight!!! lol

I am so exhausted after walking around Paris last weekend, and then straight back into work on Tuesday, getting up at 6.15, after only getting home at 7-ish on Monday night....I feel like I could sleep for a week!

Seza, if I could have sent someone for fish and chips, I would have, but Mr JG still feigning flu-like symptoms, albeit man-flu ones! Don't feel guilty!

JG x

hiya peeps
Sorry for my absinthe, have been out buying car for Mr Tiggs so Tiggs can ease off the chauffeur duties!
Shock of shocks, someone on Mastershout is cooking scallops without pea puree or black pudding, hallelujah!!!

Tiggs xxx

Annie
Noticed your comment earlier about me and my laptop last April, unfortunately I can't go (am gutted but family is family) otherwise I'd have gladly posted lots of photies!

Tiggs xxx

Seza, behave. Wasn't criticising at all. Enjoy your chips.

xxxx

Bums, Tiggs. Will now have to wait for them to sober up and put photies on FB.

xxxx

off to fill my glass to join FNWC but mine will be FNMSC or FNTJC!

Tiggs xx

men in body hugging shirts coming up, Mr Tiggs at work so again I don't need to pretend I'm not drooling of those rippling muscles.......aaaaaa!

Chips long gone Annie!! Loads of salt and vinegar on em

Yum Yum

Mr Seza now taken them to Scouts and my glass looks empty so back in a mo!

xx

Seza: Talking of Yum - there's a Chinese Takeaway in Glenrothes who do Tom Yum sauce - their Vegetable Tom Yum is to die for. Can't get it anywhere else in Fife - nobody has heard of it. It's very Yum Yum.

xxxx