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WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU KNOW SHE'S GOT IT AND IF YOU GET IN HER BED YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT.

Chris Evans | 15:32 UK time, Tuesday, 18 December 2007

but if you don't get in the bed, she might think you don't love her enough to catch the...

...flu off her.

That's what's happened to me over the last couple of days or nights rather. My wife has been slam dunked by the beastly festive flu bug and for the last couple of nights she has been literally drippinjg with sweat. I knew it was only a matter of time before the inevitable happened and the merry christmas bug bunked over to my side. And sure enough this morning I wake up like I'd been hit in the head by a large building, someone had stuck ten thousand pins and needles in my back and another guy had taken a floor sander to my throat.

That's love that is. Now she's on the mend whilst it's a quilt, a warm fire and Shrek Three for me tonight. Not a bad deal I know but I ACHE, agggghuhhhhhhh and I hate it because there's nothing you can do except for wait

Oh, yeh and ladies one more thing, this definitely isn't man flu, it's proper genuine flu that I caught off a real live woman, I know I've seen her bits.

CLP.

2007.

X..

Comments

  1. At 03:57 PM on 18 Dec 2007, wrote:

    Awwww Lambie Pie - you have my sympathies. As previously documented on the blog, I came down with the real flu in mind November, closely followed two days later by Mr Diva. We only live in a little house so there was one upstairs in bed and one polaxed on the sofa!

    Not nice.

    You havemy utmost respect and admiration for doing the show tonight - I couldn't even read Harry Potter let alone entertain the nation a week before Christmas.

    No pressure!

    Oh - another thing ...... Noel Fielding said he saw Naughty Nic curled up asleep under his control desk at R2 when he guest-presented on the Russell Brand show. So ... Naughty Nic - insomniac or power-napper? We deserve an answer!!

    Still wrapping. Will it ever end?? I only hoped someone somewhere is wrapping something for little ole me!

    Hugs and cuddles for now.

    CtD xxxx

  2. At 04:03 PM on 18 Dec 2007, Dan the Man wrote:

    Ah . . ., poor poor, Big Chief CLP.

    Loads of fresh fruit, a few wee Hot Ports (& Lemon, Cloves & Sugar) and a couple of chocolate biccies before bedtime . . .

    Forget about us, the show, everything else . .we need you at fighting form, 100%

    Get well soon . . .

    DtM

  3. At 04:16 PM on 18 Dec 2007, hazel love wrote:

    Oh, Christophe, Christophe...you are quite correct in your stating that it was only a matter of time...me and the Badger have both been struck down...sweaty, aching, no appetite, wobbly...so have several gazillion other poor blogsters from these very pages!

    If you aren't careful, it'll get ya TWICE! I ended up being signed off for a second week because I was trying to be brave, and the Badger is still hallucinating (although it is possible he's just saying that to make me think there ARE spiders) so WHAT EVER YOU HAVE LEFT TO DO IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS...see if you can get someone to help...and resign yourself to the fact that you'll probably only get half of it done...

    get well soon the pair of you
    love
    hazel
    x

    And don't have anything with caffeine in it...

  4. At 04:33 PM on 18 Dec 2007, martin james wrote:

    When it`s most wonderful time of the year, why is it we have to have colds and flu around? Have you ever met someone who hasn`t been taken by the bug at christmas? Me neither.

    My tips for flu relief are: Hot Lemsip, Vitamin C, Zinc and Echinacea suppliments. Plus plenty of H2O.

    Failing that, a good stiff whisky infront of a log fire! It`s what the director of the common cold research centre recommended to me after I`d spent a week as a guineepig testing interferon!


    m xxx

  5. At 04:42 PM on 18 Dec 2007, Gingembre wrote:

    finally feeling ok today and yesterday after nearly 3 weeks of it CLP...

    ...my sympathies are with you.

    Mind you I have lost over a stone in weight so despite how ill I was, it's kinda been worth it. Haven't been under 13 stone for a long long time!!

    Hope that all you bloggers/bloggettes are well, sorry I've been absent recently, will make up for it over the next few days

    KWx

  6. At 04:48 PM on 18 Dec 2007, Scott McFarlane wrote:

    Lets put this in perspective. There is no such thing as man flu, if woman say there is no such think as pmt. Right that that out of the way. Chris you require, plenty fluid, including a wee tot of whisky mixed with honey, a little lemon juice and hot water. If you have no honey, marmalade works just as well. This will help you drop off to sleep. Watching musicals on tv is a great distraction because you know it will have a happy ending, and some will say, come on everyong, the show must go on.......................

  7. At 05:34 PM on 18 Dec 2007, wrote:

    is more important that you were there to snuggle into her, and help with the aches. Forget your pain, take pleasure in the fact that you were able to be there for her.

    I had great pleasure in being there for my husband last week, while he sniffled and snorted and then developed a cold sore. Amazingly, I had a flu jab, and I can snuggle all I want and don't seem to be catching (touch wood) anything.

    DWNB

  8. At 06:24 PM on 18 Dec 2007, Red wrote:


    Oh Poor Lambie Pie ...

    along with everyone else 's 'recipes' loads

    of honey & of course lots of TLC x.

    X R

    Wonder if the blog's ok again.....!
    Soon see..!


  9. At 07:26 PM on 18 Dec 2007, lazykev wrote:

    whiskey does it for me...lots of it..its never cured me but it made me forgetfor a few hours

  10. At 09:21 PM on 18 Dec 2007, Simon in A Merica wrote:

    Chris, port and nightnurse mixed, then fine sir you shall sleep like a baby for 12 hours or more. I am sure the doctor would not reccomend taking the two together, but believe me it really does work.

    Was feeling pretty smug about avoiding the British winter as I am spending my first winter in California, until last week when I managed to pick up a dose of man flu, despite the balmy weather here. To add insult to injury, it's raining here today, I never agreed to rain in the contract...........

    Simon

  11. At 01:15 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Gingembre wrote:

    Hello everyone!
    Hope that you're all fine and dandy today?

    Spent the day yesterday shopping in Norwich. Had to do it all in one hit due to being poorly then going back to work right up until Christmas on Friday. It was great though, got it all done (with a few extras).

    I see loads of bloggers have been ill too.... sucks doesn't it?

    Took the kids to see Santa which was great, think I enjoy it more if I'm honest!!

    Hmmm, what about the home sec not backdating our pay??? Let's not discuss it eh? GRRRR

    Bonnet de douche

    KWx

  12. At 01:24 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Gingembre wrote:

    Hello everyone!
    Hope that you're all fine and dandy today?

    Spent the day yesterday shopping in Norwich. Had to do it all in one hit due to being poorly then going back to work right up until Christmas on Friday. It was great though, got it all done (with a few extras).

    I see loads of bloggers have been ill too.... sucks doesn't it?

    Took the kids to see Santa which was great, think I enjoy it more if I'm honest!!

    Hmmm, what about the home sec not backdating our pay??? Let's not discuss it eh? GRRRR

    Bonnet de douche

    KWx

  13. At 01:28 PM on 19 Dec 2007, wrote:

    Where is everyone? Or has the blog got a hangover today?

    CtD xxx

  14. At 01:37 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Sammie wrote:

    Hello Chaps!

    How are we? Sniffing away merrily? I know I am! I have a cold - just a cold - that's all. I had flu several years ago and th0ough I must be dying. I couldn't get out of bed for a week - literally - and then as soon as I could, went back to work! Mental really, because then I had a dreadful year of illness, all because I didn't take enough time to get well. Live and learn...

    Bingo - so sorry your girlfriend let you down - it's always worse at this time of year, isn't it? She must be mad. Tinsel is right, Singletons must stick together! However, having said that, I am going on a date tonight...

    MJ - good to hear from you - stay away from the whiskey!

    HL - are you OK?

    Gingembre - glad you're on the mend.

    S xx.

  15. At 01:50 PM on 19 Dec 2007, BINGO STAR wrote:

    Season's Greetings Ter ALL,

    Bingo Star ere.

    Just wanted ter say thanks for your kind words yesterdee ChrissieS, Tinsel & Prof Plum.

    It's a shame me and me ex as we 'it it off immediately- 'ad very good chemistry. I can only think she must ave been either married or 'ad someone else as she always 'ad excuses for being cagey/ late etc. Strange 'ow even though we were so close suddenly she doesn't want to see me - very complicated people.
    Might be the beautiful song I wrote for 'er frightened 'er off - being romantic doesn't seem ter work in real life!!!
    CLP - just don't play East17 & Stay or the brilliant new Sugababes tune Change - can't bear ter listen to them at pres being a sensitive bloke - know what am sayin'!!!!!!!

    Anyway all I think we should all go into 2008 with big postivity - I always do every year & think it'll be my year atlast.
    Determined next ter find love whatever it takes.... am gonna party/ boogie so damn 'ard me knobilly knees will be so damn extra loose by next Christmas i'll ave ter carry a sign saying "I'm not for pluckin' 'n roasting" in case people mix me up with a turkey - know what am sayin'!!!!!
    Might end up in Ukraine after all looking for love - atleast she wouldn't be able ter understand me tunes - problem sorted. Just ave ter cook 'er some goulash instead - the Ukrainian national dish - cabbage n' potato, I think, mind you might ave the same effect as beans - another reason for a relationship.... breakdown - can't win blog friends..... ain't damn win!!!!!!

    Prof Plum - Yeah thanks i'm gonna next year start making music properly - another new year resolution of mine. Atleast i've got another set of brilliant song lyrics outta me short relationship - ave ter wright a sad song now about breaking up!!!!!!!

    CLP - Very contagious this cold touch of flu - wondered when you were gonna get it as everybody I know 'as 'ad it.
    I 'ad it for four days & gave it mesen ter me ex who 'ad it for four days. I warned 'er I 'ad it & didn't want ter give it to 'er but she said she'd like ter catch anything off me & she did!!!!!! Atleast it's a short one but it is a touch of flu. I was shivering for a day.
    Chris the only way ter kick it quick is lotds of Vitamin C. Yer can get brilliant Strepsols with added C in - very good. Plus lots of The Darkness is very good for getting rid of Man Flu!!!
    Especially their Christmas tune on your show!!!!!!!

    Chow!

    PS I'll bang me Taurus astro on the later blog for ALLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    PS A message Sven style :

    Man Flu.......

    I LIKE IT NOT....... VERY MUCH........ I LIKE IT NOT!!!!!!!

  16. At 02:04 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hello everyone,

    Sorry I feel a bit out of touch I will go back and catch up on posts when I get a chance.

    I must change my job in the new year, it is so awful here. I sit here and cry from pure desperation sometimes. I still don't even know when I am finishing for christmas and no one has time to talk to me about it. I can't tell you how terrified I am at the thought of interviews and worse, telling Mr Angry! I would like some confidence for christmas please!

    I'll catch up with posts later and pop back then
    Debbie x

    PS. Hope you a little better today CLP x

  17. At 02:16 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Oh Bingo, bless you! The best things come to those who wait x

    Brilliant, I have the Taurus reading to look forward to now, are we good at interviews!!!!

    D xx

  18. At 02:18 PM on 19 Dec 2007, BINGO STAR wrote:

    Me again.......... errrr

    Sammie - Thanks for your nice words but it's me who's mad & I think she realised if she stayed with me she'd end up...... mad!!!!!!

    I'll get over 'er just i'm so sensitive..... i've been on large packs of Revels since the break up & can't even bring meself ter pick up me geetarr.

    Seriously though, thanks Sammie!!!!

    Chow!

  19. At 02:23 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Em M wrote:

    Hi all, hope you are feeling a bit better Chris, I have been very lucky so far to avoid the lergy.

    Just left work, they were all lovely to me, flowers and pressies AND I got to ring the school bell (a lifelong ambition of mine). The kids all made and signed a massive card, I started blubbing as soon as I opened it! So, childminding til 6.30 and then I'm free til the kids go back to school - hooray!

    Em xx

  20. At 02:43 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Tinsel wrote:

    Bingo, are you a girl in disguise? I thought it was only us girlies that turned to chocs in times of sorrow!!! Revels - yum - I like the flat ones the best - the ones that look like extra large galaxy counters - oh I wish they'd bring them back!

    Sammie - go girl, hope the date goes well!! I've got the office Xmas do tonight. I'm the only employee ... but I'm joining in with another company who very generously share their office space (and their Xmas dos) with me! I'm quite proud of myself - a couple of years ago I would never have dreamed of going along to something like this by myself!

    Gingembre - GRRRRR indeed. Did you ask Santa for a backdated payrise???

    CLP, hope you feel better soon - have to say you were very very brave yesterday! I loved the fact that "no-one can ever prove that man-flu is any less painful than childbirth" - ha ha ha ha ha .......

    Txx

  21. At 02:59 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Sammie wrote:

    Bingo - keep smiling!

    Next year, instead of making resolutions, set yourself targets for the year - just make sure they are achievable. (I.e. don't decide you will lose 10 stone, or be engaged by the end of the year!)

    I haven't decided on all mine yet - there will be a couple of serious ones, but there will also be something fun, like bungee jumping, or abseiling for charity - that sort of thing.

    Anyhoo - get your guitar out and write some more songs - I always write better poetry when I'm experiencing extremes of emotion.

    Failing that - if you fancy some fun - get yourself onto some dating websites - laughs guaranteed - and boy oh boy, could I share some dating stories!

    S xx.

    P.S. Tinsel - the above all applies to you too - although not sure whether or not you have a guitar!

  22. At 03:00 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Dr Sammie wrote:

    Btw - Bingo and Tinsel - I prescribe fun nights out with friends, expensive chocs, good food and wine - in fact, just indulge yourself. I also find that a massage (NOT one of those Bingo!) helps!

    Dr S xx.

  23. At 03:13 PM on 19 Dec 2007, wrote:

    Debbie

    This time last year I was in the middle of my portacabin hell. This blog really helped - as you know, everyone is so supportive and the banter can be quite refreshing at times.

    You sound like you're where I was twelve months ago (albeit in a forest with Mr Angry and not on a landfill site with a bunch of cavemen!)

    Good luck with the job hunting in the new year. Trust me when I say you will find inner-strength and confidence in spades when it comes to interviews and applications.

    As for dreading telling Mr Angry .... babe, it's his loss. If he wasn't such a nasty piece of work you wouldn't be leaving. Chances are he'll be having the same conversation with your replacement several months down the line when you will be settled into a new job.

    Just try and relax and enjoy the holiday. Walk out of work on the last day (whenever that may be!) with your head held high and have a fantastic time with Mr Debbie and the rest of your family.

    If you want to email me, you know where I am!

    Take care

    Big Hugs

    Cheryl xxxxx

  24. At 03:23 PM on 19 Dec 2007, BINGO STAR wrote:

    Alwight,

    Debbie - Sorry to hear about your work situation. Maybe you should set yourself a new years resolution & try to change jobs - 'ope it all works out.
    I've worked at some horrible places were their so unfriendly, the best thing I ever did was change jobs - gives you a new lease of life!!!!

    In the mean time i'm banging on your Taurus astro, ATLAST, on the later blog.
    I remember Deb was your idea for me ter do an astro reading fro all the signs back in November!!!!
    So yours in next Debbie. x.

    PS Thanks Debbie - yeah good things do come ter those who wait - very true, that's if we're still sane by the time they arrive - know what am sayin'!!!!!

    CtD - Yeah bit quite on the blog lately - I think everybody 'as been on the snowballs & are either being sick or 'ave 'angovers or both!!!!!

    Em M - 'ope you ave a nice Christmas break Em M - take it you are a assistant/ teacher then - must be a very rewarding job working with kids!!!

    Chow!

  25. At 05:38 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Beverley Flaxman-Binns wrote:

    Get into bed with her and just hope you dont get it

  26. At 06:52 PM on 19 Dec 2007, Red wrote:


    {{{{Debbie}}}}}}

    Head up.........

    Dont let them grind you down... :)

    X R x

  27. At 05:18 PM on 20 Dec 2007, Mark wrote:

    Hi Chris

    Non flu thingy

    Merry Christmas to you and all

    Would you be so kind as to say hello to my Son - Thomas Edginton on your show before Christmas.

    Wish him all the best and give him my love if you have time in your busy show

    Many thanks in advance

    Mark

  28. At 12:26 PM on 21 Dec 2007, Gina Atkins wrote:

    Well its my birthday tomorrow and 3 days later its Christmas I am so excited I could burst.

    I love my birthday as its always 3 days before Christmas, which is fantastic. My parents must have known they were going to have a party animal, and one who wanted to share her good times with loads of other people. Have your birthday 3 days before Christmas and you will always have a party no matter what day of the week it is.

    Another great thing about my birthday is that is the day that the sun starts to return. After the 22nd is uphill until Summer !!! How great is that!

    I LOVE CHRISTMAS I love what it does to people and how people say lovely things like Happy Christmas and smile at you. I only wish this feeling carried on through the rest of the year. I try to do my bit on that one and am as nice as I possibly can be, because it makes me feel good so its a great result all round.

    I am far to old to be this this excited about my birthday and Christmas but I just can't help it. The great thing is that it is infectious, a bit like Chris's man flu, except without the sweat and the sore throat. Mind you saying that after some of my more eventful birthday's......ha ha.

    My lovely husband Scott never used to be that enthusiastic about birthdays/Christmas until he met me. Now he's as bad as me. I will open my birthday presents at 1 minute past midnight tonight and our Christmas presents at 1 minute past midnight on Christmas Eve. The bed will be full of wrapping paper and lovely things and its just fabulous.

    We are just about to go downstairs in work and do Secret Santa. I have only been at this firm for a 6 months but this is my kind of place. We are all stopping work to do secret Santa, we have all had a bottle of champagne this morning and we are all going to the pub at 4. Who said solicitors are boring !!

    I am really looking forward to hearing the show tonight as you sounds almost as excited as me, I hope you have solved your present for the wife dilemna Chris. Mind you, she is waking up next to you on Christmas morning Poppet, that sounds a like a great present to me !!

    To all Blogees and everyone everywhere have a wonderfully joyous Christmas and the Best New Year ever.

    Love Gina xxxx


  29. At 07:18 PM on 08 Jan 2008, tumultuous wrote:

    re-christmas trees
    think carefully before discarding your old christmas tree .personally i find them immensely useful for the garden in the year ahead.trim branches back to main trunk and use as belt and braces for all kinds of support e.g. as pea sticks , delphiniums and anything that flopps.
    why send £17 to shredder

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