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THE GREAT JANE ASHER FAKE BAKE SCANDAL...

Chris Evans | 16:17 UK time, Tuesday, 2 October 2007

Is this a story that needs to be told ?

Well it's a typical media showbizz story, an indusrty sometimes as thin as a badly rolled pastry.

So JANE ASHER sends us a cake, a cake baked especially for the drivetime team, a cake that makes you feel special, it's from Jane Asher for goodness sake.

Jane, the queen of cakes, has baked a cake for us and SHE'S SENT US A LETTER as well !

So we all gather round, we open the letter and here's how it starts....

Dear PAUL O'GRADY....

She's sent one to everyone obviousl ! What were we thinking, who did we think we were ?

We've got Paul's and presumably he has ours, or even worse we haven't been sent one at all and we've just got his by mistake.

Ha ha ha. We were proper crestfallen, cos' sometimes showbizz even pulls the wool over our eyes, isn't it just marvellous ?

Anyways the cake was delicious as everyone on the third fl;oor will testify.

In other news, I came all the way in today on my little mo-mo bike. It took quite a bit longer than I imagined and was about a thousand times colder, first stop was the bike shop and a whole new set of clothes in which to drive home.

CLP 2007.

X.

Comments

  1. At 04:56 PM on 02 Oct 2007, wrote:

    CLP - never mind "Don't Forget Your Toothbrush". More a case of Don't Forget Your Themals, my friend!!


    It's getting dark here, like, proper dark and itsa only just after half four. Winter draws ever closer ... but then, so does Christmas - yipppeee!!!

    Gunners on tv tonight and sea bass for dindins. Can life get any better.

    Hello to all bloggers - you guys really do make my day!!

    Be happy and hug your loved one when you get home.

    CtD x x

    PS: martin james - are you out there mate?

  2. At 04:56 PM on 02 Oct 2007, Dan the Man wrote:

    Good for you, boy,

    Its a great feeling on the bike - with the wind in your face - an entirely different feeling of freedom and vulnerability to the elements.

    Have a great one this eve!

  3. At 05:05 PM on 02 Oct 2007, wilsmar wrote:

    So a tasty Tuesday then................. were any photo's taken of Paul's cake before it was consumed?
    You may want to buy some moisturiser - if you don't already use it - as the biking will definitely dry the skin on your face.
    Wilsmar

  4. At 05:06 PM on 02 Oct 2007, Cooly foodie wrote:

    Need to keep the cake intake up, don't worry about who it was suposed to be for.

    By the way what happend to the new restaurant?

  5. At 05:10 PM on 02 Oct 2007, wrote:

    ha ha CLP

    That reminds me of the time my Mum got her moped. She zipped about town on it quite happily, and then thought she would take a slightly longer trip on it.

    End October, climbed aboard, and zipped 23 miles to a wee town down a by-pass. When she got there, her friend had to help her off the moped cause she was frozen solid and there she sat on a chair until she defrosted.

    My poor dad then, had to drive up the road, give mum the car, and he had the joy of driving back down the 23 miles also in the freezing cold. 45 minutes later he arrived and also had to be wedged off the seat.

    Oh the olden days before leathers! (ha ha 1989).

    Mum gave up her wee moped after she took a corner at high speed (maybe 30) and went off diagonally across the road on her side. Ooooo. Sore scabs for weeks after.

    I would be quite happy if Jane Asher sent me a cake by mistake. My husband baked me a jane Asher chocolate cake mix for my birthday and it was LOVERLY.

    Much Love to All

    DWNB

  6. At 05:29 PM on 02 Oct 2007, BINGO STAR wrote:

    Ello CLP & ALL,

    Bingo Star ere.

    So yer can still 'ave yer cake and eat it in shoebizz.

    Chow!

    PS Got some Purple Kangaroo and Dancing Around The Cake - most nutritional in all areas especially errrrr............. The Ears!!!!!!!!

    What am I talkin' about?........... sorry don't know!

  7. At 07:59 PM on 02 Oct 2007, MfR wrote:

    CLP

    Perhaps she caught the vibe that you were going to have a Beatlesque show and wanted to keep the theme going?

    Reminds me of another bit in the Pattie Boyd book.

    When they were in India they used to spend many hours a day meditating, well, George and John did, Ringo only stayed a few weeks as he didn't like spicy food and his suitcase full of baked beans had run out. Anyway, they were joined by Mia Farrow and her sister, Prudence. Now, Prudence started to spend really excessive hours locked away meditating and they begun to get worried that she was getting a little too deep into this, so George and John used to stand outside her door and sing

    ''Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play?...''

    Missed Nigella and her pea soup last night, so looking forward to Jamie and 'dad' later. I swear that I am related to that man.

    Be careful on that bike Chris.

    Peace & love

    MfR

    PS Beck and Hanson

    PPS Courtney Love and Marilyn Manson

    PPPS You're all fakes!

  8. At 08:01 PM on 02 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hello CLP and Bloggers,

    I remember going for a bike ride with Mr Debbie one day with my hair pulled back in a pony tail under the helmet. Well by the time we got to our destination and I removed the helmet the top part of my hair was practically glued to my head while the bottom half was a blonde, tangled mess. Very attractive.

    Mr Debbie used to have some gear to wear under his leathers that looked a bit like a Freddie Mercury outfit. Again, very attractive.

    Lots of love to you all, have a good evening.

    Debbie xx

  9. At 08:42 PM on 02 Oct 2007, BigBump wrote:

    Evenin Christy and fellow bloggers,
    I loved the great toast debate on todays show!! In my humble opinion the best way to make toast is to place a wire cooling tray on top of a very hot aga (better if its a solid fuel one, not for the enviornment but it is for the flavor, probably arent even made anymore!) take as many slices as you can fit of thick crusty bread and put on the cooling tray, toast on one or both sides and then slather in at least half and inch of real butter, has to be butter not marge. preferably the irish one that comes in the gold wrapper with black writing!!!!!! we didn have a toaster at home for years, ours was always done on top of our turf burning( compressed peat) Stanley 8 range, if you could withstand the searing heat!
    Wee man had his first dental visit to day, he had to have an extraction (baaaaad mummy)
    but he was very good and is thrilled with all the blood hes been spitting and wants to take the tooth to show and tell on Friday, I think perhaps not.........
    Jo... Anything Stirring???

  10. At 09:37 PM on 02 Oct 2007, Prof.Plum wrote:

    A little bit of cake


    Now that reminds me of a Birthday cake I got for my daughter It was Sonic the Hedgehog ...lots of grey marzipan.... she was sick all night.


    Thats why Mams shop at Iceland.


    Good evening.

  11. At 09:55 PM on 02 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hello CLP and Bloggers,

    I remember going for a bike ride with Mr Debbie one day with my hair pulled back in a pony tail under the helmet. Well by the time we got to our destination and I removed the helmet the top part of my hair was practically glued to my head while the bottom half was a blonde, tangled mess. Very attractive.

    Mr Debbie used to have some gear to wear under his leathers that looked a bit like a Freddie Mercury outfit. Again, very attractive.

    Lots of love to you all, have a good evening.

    Debbie xx

  12. At 08:24 AM on 03 Oct 2007, Gingembre wrote:

    A cake's a cake, your gain, PoG's loss I say!???

    Morning team

    Hope you're all well today. First day back at work was tough, how the beach seemed soooooo far away - hmph.

    Well done to the British teams last night.

    No help with my tshirt request then? Oh well, thought it was a long shot.

    Have a good weds everyone

    KWx

  13. At 10:13 AM on 03 Oct 2007, wrote:

    Happy Hump Day everyone.

    What a stressful start to the day! I had to take my lovely little car into the garage which is the complete other side of a big town about 17 miles from my little sleepy market town. It took me over an hour to get there and I have learned that Essex bus drivers cannot see Nissan Micras. Grrrrrrrrrr. By the time I got there I was sooooooo stressed out and I've got to repear the whole operation in tonight's rush hour but going the other way.

    But then, Arsenal won last night so life's not all bad!

    Oh - and I had trouble downloading a ³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ podcast last night. It just didn't want to know, but then this morning it downloaded in about 2 minutes - what's THAT all about?

    Chubby Club tonight. Think I've done OK this week but ave struggled on the exercise front - it's so dark at 6.30 in the morning I just can't get out of b ed to go swimming! But I found out today that some good friends are getting hitched next April, so if that's not a good incentive to look even more gawjus, then I don't know what is!!!

    Right, busy day ahead so I'll post this now (although it will probably take about 2 hours to go thru Auntie!!!) and check back with y'all laters.

    Lotsa luv n hugs n cuddles

    CtD x x x

    PS: I thought Johnny's Welsh on last night's show made him sound like a Trekkie Klingon!

  14. At 10:20 AM on 03 Oct 2007, BINGO STAR wrote:

    Bon Joure CLPlee & UL Blug Uperatatives,

    Bingo Star ere.

    Talkin' of food I've got got mesen inter an embarrssing mess blog friends errrr.......

    I went on a date, with Jean, for a meal in a french restaurant.
    We were introduced via me local datin' agency.

    All was going well until I thought i'd impress 'er with some french as the soup arrived!

    I said errr "Bon Appetite petite errr petites".

    Suddenly she got up and poured the soup over me and left blog friends, oh I yeah..... left!!!!

    I later found out from the datin' agency that she very sensitive about 'er flat chest!!!!!!!!!!!

    Wouldn't bother me blog friends, i've got a three drawer flat chest in me bedroom....... saves room in the room - know what am sayin'!!!!!!!

    Chow!

    PS CLP man errr any chance of playing Jean LeLoup and Petite Fleur or Karma To Burn and Ma Petite Mort. Both bring back strong memories of me date in the above restaurant Petite Feel Like Eat - damn guten food!!!!!!

  15. At 12:11 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Good Morning!

    Wow, the sun in shining here in Essex. Doesn't it make a difference to everything? I work in a office in Epping Forest and it looks beautiful out of the window at the moment.

    CtD, I understand totally where you are coming from when it comes to the traffic. I live about 6 minutes away from the office and my journey to work takes me down a twisty lane. When I venture out into the town I find the traffic such a shock and so frustrating! Hope your trip back later is a little less stressful x

    Ok, lets see if this post turns up twice this time!

    Happy Hump Day all,

    Love Debbie xx

  16. At 12:40 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Q wrote:

    hi ya'll

    Not been around for a while but I see there is an imposter about.
    Only one Q and thats me.
    Moose how is ya muder, sorry it's October Murder story going?

    Bingo sorry to hear about ya date best not have soup next time.

  17. At 01:35 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hi there,

    Tried posting earlier but couldn't, it's so annoying isn't it?

    Every now and then the sun peeks through the clouds here today. I work in an office in Epping Forest and it looks lovely out of the window with the sun shining.

    CtD, I understand what you mean about the traffic. I work about 6 minutes away from home and drive down a country lane to get here. When I venture out into town I find the traffic a bit of a shock and so frustrating. I hope your return journey is less stressful for you x

    Happy Hump Day all, let's see if I can post this now!

    Love Debbie xx

  18. At 01:59 PM on 03 Oct 2007, clodagh wrote:

    Ah NO. Fancy gettin' the wrong jammy sponge.

    That's like wavin' back at somebody who's actually wavin' at the person behind you and then tryin' to dig yourself out of the eejit spot by scratchin' your nose or shakin' your hand and mutterin' Damn pins an' needles...

    Like my gorgeous friend Linder back at the turn of the 20th century when we were both good Grammar School girlies. The Senior Mistress was one of those who used to waft down the corridor in full cap and gown looking for all the world like Margaret Thatcher. On Spitting Image. Naturally us girls used to stoop down so as to make our skirts appear longer, eyes skywards so she wouldn't see the eyeshadow and books over the (somewhat exposed) chest.

    Of course, said harridan used to have some heat-seeking device to detect anything not made of feltand aertex and we rarely got away with it; but anyway, Linder's nail polish got caught in the radar and she was marched up to the office where it would be removed with concentrated sulphuric acid and a brillo pad.

    Shuffling behind her, Linder decided to give us all a treat by pulling her famous Ben Turpin face along with the two-handed V sign, just as she turned around. I shall remember the scene to my dying day as Linder stood in the spotlight of wrath, blowing raspberries over said fingers and feebly trying to explain that she thought said nail polish would come off if she blew on it.

    The squint was more tricky as she had to maintain it during every Latin lesson thereafter.

    Oh Happy Days.

    Anyway, it's back I am from God's Own Amusement Arcade, Ireland, and I'm that tired I'm snorin' as we speak. This is is the first time me bottom has hit anything but me car seat for nearly a fortnight, talk about chasin' your tail.

    So I'm off to test CLP's theory about the Power Nappin'. Wake me up before Saturday though, Singapore here we come. Hurrah!!!

    Clodagh.xx

  19. At 02:03 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hi there,

    Tried posting earlier but couldn't, it's so annoying isn't it?

    Every now and then the sun peeks through the clouds here today. I work in an office in Epping Forest and it looks lovely out of the window with the sun shining.

    CtD, I understand what you mean about the traffic. I work about 6 minutes away from home and drive down a country lane to get here. When I venture out into town I find the traffic a bit of a shock and so frustrating. I hope your return journey is less stressful for you x

    Happy Hump Day all, let's see if I can post this now!

    Love Debbie xx

  20. At 02:16 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hi there,

    Tried posting earlier but couldn't, it's so annoying isn't it?

    Every now and then the sun peeks through the clouds here today. I work in an office in Epping Forest and it looks lovely out of the window with the sun shining.

    CtD, I understand what you mean about the traffic. I work about 6 minutes away from home and drive down a country lane to get here. When I venture out into town I find the traffic a bit of a shock and so frustrating. I hope your return journey is less stressful for you x

    Happy Hump Day all, let's see if I can post this now!

    Love Debbie xx

  21. At 02:18 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Phoenix wrote:

    Sorry all kept being unable to blog - the system hated me for a change.

    Hope everyone is well and enjoying the hump day.

    Weather is miserable and the mornings are getting all mistyified - lovely to look at though across poole harbour.

    Must dash

    Phoenix

  22. At 02:23 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hi there,

    Tried posting earlier but couldn't, it's so annoying isn't it?

    Every now and then the sun peeks through the clouds here today. I work in an office in Epping Forest and it looks lovely out of the window with the sun shining.

    CtD, I understand what you mean about the traffic. I work about 6 minutes away from home and drive down a country lane to get here. When I venture out into town I find the traffic a bit of a shock and so frustrating. I hope your return journey is less stressful for you x

    Happy Hump Day all, let's see if I can post this now!

    Love Debbie xx

  23. At 02:29 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Hi there,

    Tried posting earlier but couldn't, it's so annoying isn't it?

    Every now and then the sun peeks through the clouds here today. I work in an office in Epping Forest and it looks lovely out of the window with the sun shining.

    CtD, I understand what you mean about the traffic. I work about 6 minutes away from home and drive down a country lane to get here. When I venture out into town I find the traffic a bit of a shock and so frustrating. I hope your return journey is less stressful for you x

    Happy Hump Day all, let's see if I can post this now!

    Love Debbie xx

  24. At 02:41 PM on 03 Oct 2007, clodagh wrote:

    By the crin Bingo.

    Fancy you droppin' a clanger like that. And there's me thinkin' goin' on a date with you would be like summat from Brief Encounter.

    Anyway, yous is best keepin' away from strong drink and bad women. Or rather bad drink and strong women.

    My dear cousin Barry is constantly tryin' to set me up with inappropriate men bless him, on the grounds he is a psychopath and believes every woman only wants a man to fulfil her existence.

    The latestone he said please could I text him as he needed cheering up; all his dates send for the police if he rings afterwards.

    I've told him it'll be Social Services I'm ringin', and it won't be for his mate.

    Anybody want a squirrel-chasing maniac for a night?

    Clodagh.xx

  25. At 03:23 PM on 03 Oct 2007, Debbie wrote:

    Blimey, just seen that my message has appeared over and over again! And there's me thinking that the '502 error' message meant that it wasn't going through!

    I'll leave the post button alone now, I promise!

    Debbie xx

  26. At 03:57 PM on 03 Oct 2007, wrote:

    DEbbie - good timing!! I need to find a hotel in the Epping area for a wedding next year - any ideas? Years and years ago my dad used to work on the outskirts of Epping Forest and there was a HUGE Tudor-style pub/restaurant but I can't remember what it's called nor whether it did/does accommodation! So not much use there then!

    Any ideas or suggestions would be very most welcome - you can always leave a message on my blog if you're worried about the BP not letting anything thru because of advertising!

    Phoenix - the blog has hated all of us this week. Don't take it personally!

    Auntie Beeb - PLEASE FIX THE BLOGS SO WE CAN POST PROPPA!!

    Thanks.

    CtD x x x

  27. At 04:11 PM on 14 Mar 2008, barbara Swann wrote:

    Hi Chris
    In respect of your desire to play Delilah on Friday evening drive time, it would be good if you didn't do this since the song is a glorification of domestic abuse ...i am sure that you are aware of the facts around domestic abuse and would not to unwittingly glorify it

    Domestic Violence affects 1 in 4 females and 62% of incidents involve children within the household.
    Domestic Violence equates to a quarter of all recorded crime that the Police are involved in.

    Statistics state that 1 in 2 women exposed to domestic abuse are killed every, and that a victim has been assaulted an average of 33 times before they first report it.

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