Britney Spears - '3'
There's an episode of Family Guy, where Peter Griffin gets a job as a shouty-pundit for the local TV news show, in a section called What Really Grinds My Gears. And one of the things that, y'know, reallygrindshisgears is Lindsay Lohan writhing around about attractively on TV, and not wearing a right lot, while he's sitting watching at home.
"What do you want, Lindsay? Are we gonna go out?" he bellows, "TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT! Well I'll tell you what you want, you want NOTHING!"
And although it's just a cartoon, and there's a payoff line about no woman ever wanting to do anything rude ever that I've chosen to gloss over, it's the first thing that comes to mind every single time I hear this song.
(. Which has been filmed in a sexy health spa, I think.)
I'm pretty sure that's not what Team Spears had in mind. In fact, I'm pretty sure that the reaction they wanted was something along these lines:
"Whoah! Is Britney singing about what I THINK she's singing about? SHEESUS! And I thought Katy Perry was racey! I totally HAVE to have this song in my mind at ALL TIMES. Because even the THOUGHT of Britney singing about what I THINK she's singing about is so pleasing to me, that I cannot bear not to be able to think about that thought at all times, or else I will go mad. MAD I TELL YOU!"
And if that is close to being your reaction, I cannot in all truth say that I blame you. There's some heavy-duty seduction going on here. I nearly fell for it myself, as I'm a sucker for songs where the melody is all one note.
Also, even though it's probably a bit disrespectful to go ahead with the release of this so soon after Mary from Peter, Paul and Mary died - especially in the context Britney's using their name - it's kind of brilliant that a modern days pop song can play with the image of earnest '60s folkies in this way.
On the other hand, it's an incredibly icky song, and the "hey don't be offended, it's just a bit of innocent fun" breakdown bit is rubbish. It won't pacify anyone, and it's cowardly to put it in there.
You wouldn't catch Lindsay Lohan doing it, that's for def. She's got too much class. (I KNOW!)
Download: Out now
CD Released: November 9th
³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ Music page
(Fraser McAlpine)
Comment number 1.
At 2nd Nov 2009, -RachelS- wrote:Poor Britney - she seems to have lost the plot.
Also, the production on this sounds really old fashioned to me, which is possibly not the intention - unless I'VE lost the plot!
Complain about this comment (Comment number 1)
Comment number 2.
At 2nd Nov 2009, blaze_dave wrote:That's funny, this song already debuted straight to number #1 in the US without any promo, so it must has something.
The song is for her Singles Collection, so she had Max Martin help her with this song to celebrate her 10 years in the industry. It's a solid pop song.
It's a saucy nursery type of song with an infectious beat.
As for the video, it's the best we have seen Britney in years. It's sexy and hot, but not sleazy.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 2)
Comment number 3.
At 3rd Nov 2009, Dave wrote:HA! that's well classy isn't it!
Complain about this comment (Comment number 3)
Comment number 4.
At 3rd Nov 2009, pinkparadox wrote:Someone has tapped into my worst Britney thoughts of the past ten years and used the material found to write a song.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 4)
Comment number 5.
At 3rd Nov 2009, harrythedog10 wrote:Why do artists keep releasing poor songs for greatest hits collections, first 'Wheels' and now this, Britney hasn't been able to make a good song since 'Toxic'. She seems to believe that she can throw together some outdated synth with a load of suggestive lyrics to get a hit single.
Contradictory to what I said before Fall Out Boy's new song 'Alpha Dog' for their Best Of collection is pretty awesome!
Complain about this comment (Comment number 5)
Comment number 6.
At 4th Nov 2009, Bree wrote:I personally loved the song, it's a great, catchy pop song and if it makes me want to dance, it's a winner in my books.
Anyway, hasn't it occured to anyone that the song isn't quite as dirty as it seems? Maybe that's the point. We're the ones interpreting it as a sick and sexual song... maybe we're the dirty minded once?
The song could easily be about dancing. But the fact that the song makes us think, even if it makes us shocked and disgusted, makes the song a success.
Britney hasn't lost it: au contraire, she knows exactly what she's doing.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 6)
Comment number 7.
At 4th Nov 2009, Bree wrote:Sorry, sorry, ones*
Complain about this comment (Comment number 7)
Comment number 8.
At 5th Nov 2009, CurtainJerker wrote:Who said it was sick, or that they were disgusted?
I mean, I'm disgusted by how much of a turd the song is, obviously, but that's all...
Complain about this comment (Comment number 8)
Comment number 9.
At 5th Nov 2009, harrythedog10 wrote:I agree with CurtainJerker, Bree you can't seriously think this song isn't as dirty as it seems. The lyrics seem pretty blatant.
Sample Lyric: 'Let's just do it you and me - You and me - Or three - Or four - On the floor'
Complain about this comment (Comment number 9)
Comment number 10.
At 5th Nov 2009, Bree wrote:^ Maybe she's talking about the dance floor? ;]
Okay okay, I'm not saying that there aren't connotations, but to me it's one of those make of it what you may kind of things, and to me, it's a song about dancing.
...I'd like to add that I'm not 12.
Complain about this comment (Comment number 10)