Hi Honey, I'm ³ÉÈË¿ìÊÖ!
Hello ChartBloggerers! I am offically BACK NOW, and eager to find out what has been happening since I've been away.
*Goes to look at ChartBlog, comes back*
Hmmm...apparently I have spent the last fortnight tied to a chair, being forced to listen to Madonna non-stop, all day long. Now, I have no recollection of such a thing happening, but I suppose that I could have just repressed the traumatic memories. And now I come to think about it, the suntan I thought I had does seem to be a bit patchy.
It's more of a criss-cross pattern, really, suggesting burns from a heavy rope. Hmm...
Tell you what, I'll just pop something by Madonna on the ChartBlog stereo while you look over the important things we've all learned in the past couple of weeks. That's sure to drive any hidden memories to the surface, just like in Zoolander. See you on the other side...
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Things We Have Learned:
THING 1: You can say anything you like about Gym Class Heroes (including "I have no idea what possessed them to release this as a single"), and no-one will bat an eyelid. But woe betide you if you call Imani Coppola of Little Jackie "Armani", by accident.
THING 2: Biffy Clyro are in the Top 5? The Top 5 SINGLES CHART? BIFFY CLYRO? How long have I been away for?
THING 3: Royworld: Not For Kids.
THING 4: It's hard to tell whether it's Natalia who has the street team or Dr Dre, but SOMEONE'S been press-ganged into making comments, and lots of 'em. This is a good thing.
THING 5: It is now legitimate to refer to your holidays in the UK as "my English vacay".
THING 6: From here on in, no blog, no review, no article, no newspaper feature, no short story, hell, no NOVEL can be said to be of any real worth, if it does not feature the line "grammatically, it makes me want to vomit". This is the best line ever written in the English language (so far).
THING 5 point 1: Although, to be fair "who has an ass so dirty that you have to wash it with a hard jet of water?" runs it a very close second...
THING 6: Never has the axiom that the act of observing something changes it been so colourfully explained than in this review of the new single by Sigur Ros. It also mentions sick. This is clearly a theme.
THING 7: Apparently "Dido v1.0 is set to return soon." RUN! RUN TO THE HILLS!
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Welcome back. The good news is I got all the way through '4 Minutes' and I haven't wanted to kill anyone at any point. The bad news is, this kind of proves that I have been brainwashed after all. I ALWAYS want to kill someone when '4 Minutes' is on. Bah!
Comment number 1.
At 5th Sep 2008, pinkparadox wrote:Glad I could contribute... :)
Complain about this comment (Comment number 1)