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The Hoosiers - 'Worst Case Scenario'

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Fraser McAlpine | 12:57 UK time, Monday, 31 December 2007

The HoosiersThere has been a meeting in Hoosiers HQ, between the band and some shadowy, scary figures from high up in their record company. The type who wear business suits even in bed, and who'd think nothing of kicking five underperforming (but prestigious) indie acts off their label before breakfast. It has been a tense meeting, and no-one is leaving with a smile on their face.

"Boys," a cigar-chewing mogul has said, "I get what you're shooting at with the whole ELO/comic book thing. I'm loving your work. You should consider me a humble fan. But you gotta be a bit less with the clever, hear me? Some of your fans don't get your references...."

"But sir," a Hoosier has replied, "that's half the point. We throw these things into our songs so that there's extra context. The people who know who Ray Harryhausen or Steve Ditko are can pat themselves on the back that they recognise a reference, and maybe the people who don't can go and look it up on the internet. I mean they SHOULD know who these people are, so it's sort of like a public servi-"

"I ain't interested in no cockamamy public service, son" the suit sneers back "all I want is for you fellas to sell your songs to people. And people ain't interested in being educated about cultural history, even if it's really cool stuff like monsters and Spider-Man and whatever. All they want is entertainment! Now, what song are we releasing next?"

"W-w-well...sir, we rather wanted to put our new song out, y'know 'I'm Oliver Postgate's Shazam Triffid'..."

"HAVEN'T YOU BEEN LISTENING TO A WORD I SAY?"

Tears are forming in three sets of scared eyes.

"Yes sir, sorry sir. We'll put out 'Worst Case Scenario' instead, shall we? I mean it's a good song, darker than the last two, and a bit less arch. That should make people feel a bit less scared of us, shouldn't it sir?"

"Well, son, I hope so, I truly do. We're leaving now, but we'll talk about that 'ironic' moustache next time, sonny..."

And with that, the meeting has ended, leaving the band devastated and feeling very alone, the poor mites...

Three starsDownload: Out now
CD Released:
December 31st

(Fraser McAlpine)

Comments

  1. At 07:14 PM on 01 Jan 2008, Roseanne1991 wrote:

    Hey you posted the video from my Youtube account :)

    I love this song especially the first few seconds. I hope they get to release Cops And Robbers too.

    3 stars?? Go on make it 3 and a half, go on plz :)

  2. At 07:22 PM on 01 Jan 2008, flossy wrote:

    The video doesn't seem to be workin!?!?

    [How strange. Seems to work fine for me... Sorry to hear that, Floss. - Fraser]

  3. At 08:42 PM on 01 Jan 2008, Roseanne1991 wrote:

    The video works fine for me. :)

  4. At 09:36 AM on 02 Jan 2008, SarahLH wrote:

    Just three stars?! You cheapjack, (lol!)!

    I'm with Roseanne, I'd like to see them release Cops and Robbers, it's easily one of the best off the album.

  5. At 03:29 PM on 08 Jan 2008, Clare wrote:

    3 stars?!?! what the heck?! they rock and the moustache is a legend?! get over the fact that they're cooler than you ever can be?! besides, i bet you grew one and got laughed at. it's a good song and it's laughing at the typical british pessimism. get over yourself...the dialogue was awful.

    [Haha! So you get that it's not really real, but you think I'm the record company guy, is that it? OK then.. - Fraser]

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