Many children stammer when learning to speak.
Even though this is completely natural, it often leaves parents understandably worried about their child鈥檚 language development.
We chatted to the charity and Speech & Language Therapist, Janet Cooper, who shed some light on stammering and how to help your child with their stammer.
What is stammering?
鈥淪tammering, or stuttering, is where the flow of speech is altered,鈥 says Janet.
Someone who stammers knows exactly what they want to say, but repeats, stretches, or gets stuck when saying particular sounds or words.
There may be signs of physical effort or tension as the person works to get the word out.
The person may sometimes swap words or speak less if they are finding moments of stammering difficult.
Some examples of stammering in children are鈥
- Stretching out sounds like saying, "I want a ssstory."
- Repeating parts of words e.g. "Mu-mu-mumu-mummy."
- Getting stuck on the first sound of a word so that no sound can be heard for a few seconds.
- Using their body (e.g., face or hands) to put extra effort into saying certain sounds or words.
- Holding their breath or taking a big breath before speaking, so breathing seems uneven.
- Using body movements to help get a word out, such as stamping their foot.
- Losing eye contact when they are stuck on a word .
- Trying to hide their stammer by pretending they have forgotten what they want to say, changing a word they have started to say or going unusually quiet.
Stammering exists on a spectrum, and different people will have different experiences.
How common is stammering?
According to the charity STAMMA, about 8% of children (one in every 12) will stammer at some point, and most of these will go on to talk fluently.
Stammering often first appears between the ages of 2 and 5. Stammering is not caused by nerves but by a range of factors, including genetics. We know that people who stammer are more likely to have children who stammer.
When children are learning language, their speech will not come out smoothly and they may hesitate more or repeat certain sounds of particular words.
It is important to remember that no one鈥檚 speech, whether a child or an adult, is completely smooth and fluent all the time.
It is very normal for children, whether they stammer or not, to repeat words and phrases while they鈥檙e planning the rest of what they want to say.
Current research and surveys indicate that just 1-2% of adults stammer.
If your child is stammering and you or your child are worried about it, you can seek advice and support from a Speech & Language Therapist.
When should I be worried about my child鈥檚 stammer?
It is very normal for parents to worry if their child starts to stammer. Many parents worry about the future 鈥 about the impact stammering might have on school friendships, dating and careers.
For most young children, stammering will disappear over time. For those who continue stammering, it does not need to have a negative impact on their life.
Stammering is the way some people talk, and it is not a barrier to careers, friendships, and fun.
It can be difficult to tell whether a child is going through a temporary period of stammering or not.
Whilst stammering will disappear over time for most children, speech and language therapy can help if you or your child are worried about stammering. They will be able to advise if your child may benefit from therapy and can help you and your child understand what is happening.
If you are worried about your child鈥檚 stammer or it is affecting their wellbeing, performance in school, ability to make friends and their mood or behaviour, it is best to seek help.
How can I help my child with their stammer?
1. Focus on their words, rather than the stammer
鈥淵ou don't necessarily need to draw attention to the stammer,鈥 Janet says. 鈥淛ust be patient. Really show your child that you are listening and responding to what they're saying to you, not how they're saying it.鈥
Try to pay attention to what they are saying, not how they're saying it.
Give your child time to finish what they are saying, and when appropriate, repeat it back to them to show that you are listening and interested in what they have to say.
2. Be patient and listen
鈥淵ou don't necessarily need to draw attention to the stammer,鈥 Janet says. 鈥淛ust be patient. Really show your child that you're listening and responding to what they're saying to you, not how they're saying it.鈥
Janet says, 鈥淚t's all about listening. Do not try and correct it. Don't bombard your child with questions.鈥
Instead, try using statements or comments for your child respond to such as, "I can see you鈥檙e drawing an elephant. I wonder what you鈥檒l draw next."
If you do need to ask questions, ask them one at a time and give your child time to answer between each one.
When your child asks you a question, try to pause before you answer and keep your own speech relaxed and calm.
Tempting as it is, try not to finish your child鈥檚 sentences for them.
If you are in a busy house, give each child time to talk. A child who stammers may find it more difficult to get into a busy conversation, particularly if other people keep talking over them.
鈥淢ake sure everybody gets a turn,鈥 Janet says. 鈥淛ust be mindful, perhaps not rushing, and making sure that you're actively listening to each person.鈥
3. Slow down your speech
鈥淪lowing your own talking down as an adult, automatically takes some of the pressure off your child,鈥 says Janet, but do not tell them to slow down or take a deep breath.
Children very often mirror the way that you're talking. If you are talking more slowly, they will naturally slow down with you.
This can make talking easier for some people.
4. Changing our language
It is easy to accidentally talk about stammering in a negative way, such as saying "your stammering has been bad this week" or "good girl, you said that without stammering."
This language can make a child feel as though they are failing in some way or that they have done something wrong when they stammer. This can make a child feel anxious about their talking or reluctant to talk.
Think about the language you are using with your child. Try to use neutral language when describing their stammer, such as using the terms more and less. You can say, "you've been stammering less this week."
If it feels right for your child, acknowledge their speech difficulties and give them reassurance and encouragement.
5. Have one-on-one time
Try to spend some one-on-one time (just five minutes every day) with your child, where they are not competing for attention with tasks or other family members.
Give them time when they can chat in a relaxed manner without feeling that they need to rush to say what they want to say.
Focus on giving your child your undivided attention during this special time, whilst keeping your own rate of speech slow and using comments rather than asking your child lots of questions.
Further advice
- Check out (also know as the British Stammering Association) ) for their helpline and web chat service, as well as lots of written information, videos, workshops, and support groups for parents of children who stammer.
