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Last week, my wife and I received a lovely gift.ÌýÌýIt was magnificently packaged in seasonal wrapping paper, with an end-of-year message that was so appreciated.ÌýÌýThe gift arrived after Diwali and Chanukah, but before Christmas, yet made no mention of them. This beautiful present triggered one of my annual moans – the attempt to merge these festivals into one lovely celebration of light and love.ÌýÌýI saw an especially annoying instance this year, but I probably can’t mention who was responsible!

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Christmas is sacred to Christians as the anniversary of the birth of Jesus.ÌýÌýDiwali, celebrated by Jains, Hindus, Sikhs and some Buddhists, symbolises the spiritual victory of good over evil, knowledge over ignorance and, of course, light over darkness.ÌýÌýChanukah is distinct from both. It’s the celebration of the Jewish victory in a war many centuries ago against those who wished to replace Judaism and the rededication of the Temple in Jerusalem that followed. Light does play a role in each, but they are very different.ÌýÌýIn fact, I think that falsely conflating them doesn’t bring us together but denigrates our own unique traditions and religious beliefs.ÌýÌýA Jewish idea can be adapted to tackle this reality.ÌýÌýThe ancient rabbis said, ‘just as people don’t look alike, so they don’t think alike, rather each has a unique way of thinking’.

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We lose a great deal by pretending that we all subscribe to the same core religious principles.ÌýÌýWe believe very different things, and dare I say it, some of these beliefs conflict with each other.ÌýÌýStating this simple truth does not widen the gap between us, as some believe.ÌýÌýInstead, it enables us to be honest about where we agree and where we can’t, the best basis for building lasting relationships with people from different traditions. A close friend, not Jewish, once explained to me what this honesty allows to achieve – to disagree better.ÌýÌýI love this idea and I’ve quoted it many times.ÌýÌýI believe that this something we all need to do – disagree better.ÌýÌýThe winter holiday season, whether or not you are celebrating a religious festival, is the best time of the year to learn to do just that. Wishing all my Christian friends a meaningful, safe and peaceful Christmas and wishing all of us a restful winter break.

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