Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Any Sun readers feeling a bit queasy this morning? A bit disorientated, discombobulated, disjointed? It would be interested to know because of the cumulative effect of pages one, three and five.
Page One: "PAEDO HEAVEN ON OUR HIGH ST - Stores in new kids' bra row". Horrible stuff, better turn over.
Page Three: Oooh! Look! Breasts! And skimpy lacy knickers! Turn over quick.
Page Five: NOW TAKE THESE OFF THE SHELVES - 'Sexy' girl garments must end. Ugh...
Readers' emotions are being marshalled in the matter of split seconds from disgust to lust and back to disgust. No doubt there's a thesis to be written on all of this. But being a monitor of very little brain, that's a job for someone else.
One is instead further amused by the news commentary offered by the resident of page three, Danni, 23, from Coventry. You'll remember that yesterday Chloe, 22, from Leeds was citing George Bernard Shaw in her analysis of the Conservative manifesto. Today Danni says that she is excited by the breakthrough creating disease-free designer babies from three parents. "We can now separate problematic pronuclei form healthy mitochondria cells in the DNA of two women and a man. Always helps to have an extra woman on board."
Amused or offended? Curses, Sun, you are playing with us.