Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Let's play spot the model. It's not hard.
In the slightly chaotic group photo of Sarah Brown's guests at Downing St, seemingly only one of the two dozen or so women crowding into frame knows EXACTLY which camera to play to.
Some smile to the left, some to the right, some up, some down. Some, including Michelle Obama, get the right camera, but none nail it quite like Naomi Campbell. Eyes a-glow, smile wide, she beams right at you - yes, you - from the pages of the Times.
She is, after all, a trained pro, able to instantly adopt just the right facial expression at just the right time for just the right camera. Everyone has at least one talent, and she is a master of this particular skill.
Kate Moss, on the other hand, doesn't do smiling. Her skill lies in glowering enigmatically - looking at or through you? - down the barrel of the lens, as demonstrated in the Daily Star, in New York for the TopShop opening. While the party itself was waaaay past Fleet St's deadline, place your bets now for which of Friday's papers will run snaps of her holding hands with Jennifer Lopez.
Meanwhile, the papers had their own bash that went on waaaay past deadline on Tuesday - the British Press Awards. Hence the blowing of trumpets only starts in earnest today.
Many congratulations to Charlie Brooker, columnist of the year for his always entertaining Guardian rants, and to the Times, named newspaper of the year. It celebrates by reprinting the judges' comment that it is "Britain's most authoritative paper, but without being as po-faced".
This no doubt means the Times has taken off its horn-rimmed glasses and shaken out its bun of late. But Paper Monitor, smarting that it was not invited to be a "plus one" at the event, chooses to read this as "without being as po-faced as Newspaper X". Fill in the name according to your own preference.