Paper Monitor
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Rare is the man who can get his mug on every single newspaper front, including the Financial Times. Lewis Hamilton is his name.
His last-minute grabbing of the Formula 1 world championship is the cue for an orgy of pre-planned coverage.
Pictures of driven, tunnel-visioned eight-year-old Hamilton - check.
Speculative piece on first billionaire sportsman - check.
Visit to local pubs, the Marquis of Lorne, Stevenage, and the Rose and Crown, Tewin where journalists almost outnumber actual drinkers - check.
Excessive number of pictures of Nicole Scherzinger (head of the popular beat combo the Pussycat Dolls) - check.
Even the newspapers-that-don't-have-a-poppy-in-their-masthead (Independent and the Guardian) go Hamilton-mad.
The Independent shunts the sick dolphins off the front page in favour of the golden boy.
But you have to go to the Financial Times for the real gem in the coverage. It's not their strip on page four, it's the byline: "By Roger Blitz, Leisure Industries Correspondent." Paper Monitor wants that byline, we wants it.